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Potty training

I'm so at a loss. We have been potty training our son for some time now, and he is FINALLY catching on. BUT he refuses to poop in the toilet. That is the ONLY time he is wet, is if he has pooped in his underwear. Ppl have told me to try rewarding him, but I can't try, cuz he has never done it. I get on to him for doing it in his underwear. He's seen that his cousin will use the toilet. I make him sit on the potty if he does it in his underwear. He goes and hides if he has had an accident, so I know that he knows its wrong. But he still does it all the time. I'm at my wits end, any advice PLEASE. BTW, hes 3

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:00 AM on Mar. 11, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (5)
  • Do you change him immediately when he has an accident? A few minutes feeling gross and uncomfortable might make him want to start going on the potty.. It takes them a while to get the reason for the grumble in your tummy means ya gotta go. He'll get there. Don't reward him, praise is ok but you dont want him to think hell get a treat everytime he has a BM...

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:09 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • My son did the same thing. He was for the most part scared of it. It was new and weird. He doesn't like change and has always had trouble adjusting to new situations.

    Here is what I did to help. First, he and I both worked to make a "Potty Chart". We got bright paper in the color he wanted. I let him draw on it and we bought some really cute stickers that he wanted. In my son's case that was Thomas the Tank Engine stickers. Then I made a big deal (in a nice, positive way) that the stickers are only for when he poops in the toilet. And when he did he was allowed to pick a sticker and put it on the chart. After accumulating 5 stickers he got a reward. For us it was a trip to Chuck E Cheese.


    Answer by AnnaMac at 1:12 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • To start DS was like yours. He didn't really care for the reward. I don't think he quite comprehended how it worked. So when he pooped in his pull-ups I took him straight into the bathroom and manuvered a way to have him sit on the toilet, take off the pull ups and have the poo fall into the toilet. That way he got used to the "dropping" noise. Than I would make a HUGE deal about what a wonderful job he did. How his poop went in the toilet. He got to pick a sticker and put it on the chart. I know he didn't fully accomplish what was asked, but it was a step in the right direction and motivated him to do better. It took a few weeks, but he did catch on.

    Also using an insert on the "big potty" helped. He never liked the little potty. For the most part relax and let him learn at his pace. Don't rush or force and make progress by taking small steps at a time. Good Luck!!


    Answer by AnnaMac at 1:12 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • we just had the exact same thing happen with our son a few weeks ago. Finally go thim potty trained but he wouldnt poop in the potty. We really didnt make a big deal about it. We just told him that if he pooped in his underware that they would be thrown away. and we did actually throw them away. When i noticed he was trying to poop i would sit him on the potty. My HD would sit with him for an hour sometimes just to make sure he pooped in the potty. I think his problem was that he was scared to do it. But once he knew that it was like he started telling me he needed to poop. And for the past 2 weeks we have been completely successfull! Hope i helped!

    Answer by Amanda7891 at 2:49 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • My son did just about the same thing (well both my sons). With the first, he had to take off his clothes, dump the stink in the toilet, clean up the mess on the floor (if it was there), and dress himself in clean clothes. That was a MAJOR punishment for him. He hated doing that and soon learned to do them in the toilet. It's not working with my second son. He gets SO excited to see a stink in his undies and LOVES cleaning it up. Grrrrrrr. Maybe it will work for your son.

    My sons also usually do a stink after breakfast. At one point I even made my son stay in the bathroom until he did a stink in the morning. He wasn't allowed out until he finished. That worked pretty well. Hmmmm. I need to do that with the second son.

    Answer by micheledo at 8:31 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

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