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What do you do when all you feel like doing is dying?

I am not a troll. I have never been diagnosed as depressed, but some days I feel like living is pointless. A lot of days I sincerely feel like I have nothing to live for. I am very overweight, which effects my self-esteem, and I know that is part of it, but I just don't know. Today is a good example, I had a long, horrible day at work. I get pushed around and stepped on there every day, then I come home, already feeling guilty because we cannot afford for me to stay home with out DD, and then its like I come home and she doesn't even want to see me. (She isn't even two yet). And I argue with my DH, probably just because I had a bad day at work, or because we are broke, and then I feel useless in our relationship. I don't know what I am even alive for, I don't do any good for anything. Me being alive is not postive in any aspect. I cant afford to go to therapy, I guess I just needed to vent. My heart breaks all the time.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:14 AM on Mar. 11, 2010 in Health

Answers (11)
  • Get a job. It helped me get out of depression. :)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:17 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • Imagine your children or your husband finding you dead in the morning after you've just committed suicide in the most pain free way (drug overdoes). ...Avoiding that is enough to live for.

    I found my mom dead in my bedroom 4 days before my 22nd birthday last April. She wasn't a very positive aspect (at that time in her life) in anyone's life either but i promise you we'd all rather have her alive and with use today then where ever she might be now.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:18 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • anon. you clearly did not read her post.
    She has a job.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:19 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • Go out to nature..Be mindful..Be thankful..Don't leave your child without a mother that is the worst thing that could ever happen to a child..Take deep breathes, you are alive, be happy.Practice YOGA!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:37 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • Actually, you sound like me before I found out I was hypothyroid. I STRONGLY SUGGEST YOU GO TO YOUR DOCTOR. Tell them what is going on. Include examples of how it affects your day. Good luck and keep us posted.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:12 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • Get a complete physical; if necessary get a referral to a therapist
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 5:32 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • When you feel like you have nothing positive going on in your life look for small things and write them down throughout the day. Even if they seem silly like I'm having a good hair day, I made it thru that light. I've struggled with depression since I was 16 & it can get pretty bad. Do you have friends? TALK to people about it, keeping it to yourself is what will make it worse, I struggle with that still. Do you go to church? A lot of pastors/priest etc will do therapy for free. Look into Celebrate Recovery, it is a 12 step program, but it is for everything! They have free childcare too. Make sure you look nice too even when you don't even have the energy to shower, because it will make you feel better about yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:58 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • sorry you take your life for granted. You need to write down all the positive things in your life & focuss on that & not the negative. Plant a garden, stick you hands in some dirt, be glad you live in America & have a healthy family & that you are ABLE to work & provide for them. Know that there are millions of people in this world who would happily trade places with you & love the life you're living now.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:57 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • Hugs....Ive been there.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

  • I have been there too. As hard as it may be, try to think of some positive things that will make you smile...like your daughters smile or laugh..the sunshine in the mornings...the sound of birds singing...raindrops on a warm day.There is a reason for you living or you wouldn't be here. Don't ever forget that. You have to find your own happiness, your own way. The deeper you allow yourself to sink, the harder it will be to come out. If you can, make an appt with a doctor. If you live in a state that has been cold for winter and dreary, you may have seasonal depression and you can take Vitamin D3 to help..and it does work. You can also be prescribed an antidepressant. If it helps,maybe try to get outside everyday after work..maybe take your daughter for a walk. Hang in there and don't give up.
    kimberlyinberea

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 9:46 AM on Mar. 11, 2010

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