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BM just won more child support!!! :( Not fair as she is not working and will be making just $600 less than I (working 40 hrs) per week! I am frustrated as to why the judge didn't tell her to get a JOB!!!

The BM divorced DH 7 years ago, remarried right away...got divorced 2 years after that. Met her current husband 3 months before marrying him. She very sloppy, lazy and is setting a bad examble for the skids. My DH and I work very hard for what we have and try to install GOOD morals and values in our children, but with having to pay almost $400 more a month is c/s it's going to be tough for us to maintain the lifestyle in which we are accustomed. Any advise?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on Jun. 26, 2008 in Money & Work

Answers (10)
  • Accept it! C/S is not for the BM it's for the kids. It's so that they can have food, lights, clothing, shelter, heat etc. I understand how it's tuff. The BM job status has no baring on what your husband financial responsibly is towards his kids.  I may not have first hand experiences in this matter, but I know what it's like. Since I've grown up and moved out my Mom has remarried and her husband has to pay monthly child support (a huge amount) AND 2/3 of the college tuition for his oldest.

    As a result they don't have any money and have had to give up a lot of things, just to pay the bills. Does my Mom get flustered over it? Yes she does, Does he sure he does, but at the same time he knows that it's for his girls and because of it they have a place to live and food to eat.

    SAHMinIL

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 4:20 PM on Jun. 26, 2008

  • Just because they have "Judge" in front of their names, doesn't make them wise or right. Try to appeal with your attorney if you feel that his ruling was wrong.
    MommasCooCoo

    Answer by MommasCooCoo at 8:19 PM on Jun. 26, 2008

  • Hey you picked him so deal. He has to pay for his kids regardless of how you feel. I don't feel bad for you in the least.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:23 PM on Jun. 26, 2008

  • Do you get child support or are your children your spouses as well? Child support does seem unfair at times b/c it is based on a percentage of earned income. However, the children he had with BM were born before the children you share and it appears he paid very little child support, $200? a month, until recently. I am sad for you in this economic time of extreme hardship. Maybe your attorney can get the amount decreased, but if not, remember he is investing in the future of his and your children, whether by birth or by marriage! Good Luck!!!
    AnneZbeth

    Answer by AnneZbeth at 9:58 PM on Jun. 26, 2008

  • well get used to it.its a fact of life, he has to pay for his kids. i am divorced and i hardly get anything for the two girls.I was told mine was going to up and quit his job, again. there go my support.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:08 PM on Jun. 27, 2008

  • have him fight for full custody. then he wouldnt have to deal with that!?
    LauraLeeTo

    Answer by LauraLeeTo at 12:04 AM on Jun. 28, 2008

  • plus if the judge sees shes been in 2 different marriages since, shes kind of draging the kids through that too...

    --- hey i bet you not all the money she gets goes to the kids like its supposed to! i know people who are like that!
    LauraLeeTo

    Answer by LauraLeeTo at 12:06 AM on Jun. 28, 2008

  • I agree with you that it isn't fair!!! I am in a similar situation & it SUCKS!!! As for those of you who say "You married the guy deal with it!" You can't help who you fall in love with & we & our children shouldn't have to suffer because of some self-centered, manipulative whore who can't pull her head out of her ass to support herself or her kid(s). CHILDREN ARE NOT LOTTERY TICKETS!!!
    My advice, go for full custody. If that is not an option you can have your DH work a lower paying job & get a second job to compensate for the lower income. She can only go after his main (highest paying) full time job for C/S calculations!!
    Best of Luck! I feel for you! email me and we can chat or I can give you more support or advice!
    momofspuds

    Answer by momofspuds at 1:50 PM on Jun. 29, 2008

  • YOU KNOW WHAT? TOUGH LUCK DON'T TRY TO BLAME THE MOM FOR GETTING CHILD SUPPORT,NO ONE IS THERE WHEN THE KIDS ARE IN NEED AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT ON GOING ON IN THERE HOUSE,HE NEEDS TO PAY FOR THE KIDS HE HELPED CREATE, SHE WAS'NT A WHORE WHEN HE WAS WITH HIM! I'M GLAD THE JUDGE MADE THE ORDER AND SAW IT FOR WHAT IT IS,I WENT THROUGH THIS AND I'M GLAD MY JUDGE WAS FAR,EVEN THOUGH HE DON'T LIKE IT I STILL GET MINE AND WILL CONTINUE TO GET IT.IT ACTUALLY COAST MORE WHEN THE CHILD IS LIVING WITH YOU THEN WHEN THEY ARE NOT SO DEAL WITH IT,IT IS....WHAT IT IS!!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:34 PM on Jul. 2, 2008

  • I disagree that it costs more when the child is living with you than when the child is not. I also don't agree that she should be collecting child support when she herself isn't supporting the child. SHE ISN'T WORKING!!! It takes two to create a child & TWO to support that child. She should not get off scootfree!!!!!
    momofspuds

    Answer by momofspuds at 9:34 AM on Jul. 11, 2008

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