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how much disapointment is too much?

My ex and I are trying to work things out again, he lives in another state but we are talking about him moving out here and see how things go (he freelances, and can work from whereever). Well, the last couple of times he is suppost to come out here, something always comes up and he has the delay it. BUT, he doesn't want me to go out while he isnt here. So basically, I have to wait at home for him to come visit and keep getting disapointed when he changes dates on me. I feel like my life is on hold waiting for him. IE: He says he will be here Monday, it changes to Friday afternoon, now it's Friday at midnight. How much of this do I put up with? I really want it to work, but this is the same problem we had last time we were togather. Help!

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:56 PM on Mar. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Clearly you are not a priority to him. Quit making him your priority and continue on with your life.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

  • i would go and do things. live your life like you have been if you werent waiting for his butt. whenever he decides to show then work on it then but if you keep waiting for something thats may not happen, your gonna wonder why you even put your time into it so go on with your life and when it happens

    Answer by americansugar80 at 3:04 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

  • if he lives far enough away...he's not gonna know a whole lot of what your doing.

    Answer by americansugar80 at 3:06 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

  • You have your life to live and for some strange reason he's postponing seeing you. Why haven't you made a surprise visit where he is to see exactly what he's doing to continue cancelling his time to spend with you?

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 4:12 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

  • Do you want it to work because you know him and it would be easier than getting a new beau? He is not worried about you. If he freelances, what is stopping him from coming out when he says he is going to? There is something that is keeping him there that he considers more important. And what about you? You wait day after day waiting for him to come and he never shows. He doesn't like you going out because he knows that you are a capable person and he wants to control you. He knows that he has you under his control and he knows that no matter when he comes, you will be there waiting for him like he wants. You need to drop him and move on. It may be hard at first, but trust me, after a while you will realize how much better it is to be the person you want to be. You can also get a new, better man. Good luck. I hope you do find happiness.


    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 5:08 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

  • "he doesn't want me to go out while he isnt here"
    I bet he doesn't-

    cut your loses and get on with things- I hope you find a man that appreciates you!

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:48 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

  • I'd tell him I'd stop going out when he starts showing up. He can't have his cake and eat it too

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:27 PM on Mar. 12, 2010

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