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Advice on when I should try to have a baby.

I'm a young woman, 22 years old, who got married this past August, my husband is 25. When we first got engaged, our original plan was to begin trying for a baby when I was around the age of 23. Plans changed though when I decided that I wanted to return to college full time, and I enrolled in a 3 year diploma program, of which I have finished my first year.

Problem is, I'm now at the point where I am emotionally ready for a child, and so is my husband. I'm ready for the sleepless nights, diaper changes and teething fussiness. I'm watching my best friend go through all the life changes, and I feel completely ready, my family has even noticed i'm at that point.

Do you think it's better to wait for the house and career and simply deal with the longing, or is it worth it to give into that longing and work a little harder later? and FYI, we have the financial means to support a child, so that's not part of the issue.

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Asked by cstevenson at 10:38 PM on Mar. 14, 2010 in Trying to Conceive

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • I don't think you have to wait for the house with a picket fence, but at least wait til you've completed your studies. If you have a baby now, you are either already choosing to stop your study or place the baby in full time daycare, and it's not even conceived yet! If you didn't feel emotionally ready last year, then you are only just there now, you will still be ready in a couple of years. Just wait, they are a very permanent fixture when they arrive.

    Answer by myheartx4 at 10:46 PM on Mar. 14, 2010

  • I really think that your the only one who can really answer this. If you really think its time to have a baby and think you can handle all the extra work along with your studies then I say go for it. But I would make sure you take into consideration that you might have to give up your studies if things dont work out, or there is complications with you or baby, after or during pregnancy.

    Answer by Sophie4910 at 10:56 PM on Mar. 14, 2010

  • You should wait until you are ready to dedicate all of your time to a baby. If you are enrolled in school and have a newborn at home that would be unfair to your baby to not have his mommy home with him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:06 PM on Mar. 14, 2010

  • No woman with out a child is 100% ready for a child. But the second she holds that baby in her arms that all changes. :)

    Answer by MoMmY2APrince85 at 11:27 PM on Mar. 14, 2010

  • Definitely don't have to wait until all things are perfect to have a child, like others said. Also, like others said, if you are going to school full-time you will have to juggle what gets your time and attention. One or the other is going to come up short, at least some of the time. I have a full scholarship getting my AA but I waited until she was a year old and I am quitting after I get my AA (maybe doing a one-year zoological program or something like that) because I can't imagine doing a rigorous degree program that took up a ton of time and energy because I would feel like an absent parent. When baby arrives, you might not want to leave for school, so be prepared for that. Consider what it will mean with school and decide what is best for you, but no, you don't have to wait until every single duck is in a row.

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 2:03 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • i would say if you feel you are ready then go for it for some ppl it seems like it happens over night and others it takes years so good luck to you and i wish you the best!!!!

    Answer by Mother_18 at 11:33 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

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