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How did you decide how far apart to space your children?

If you planned your babyspacing, or even if you left it up to chance with some planning, how did you decide what the gap would be? What factors were important to you in that decision? If you have several kids, do you like one age gap better than another? Why?


Asked by Bellarose0212 at 4:42 AM on Mar. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

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Answers (15)
  • Mine are 12, 10, 7 and 3. It is nice to have them close together when they are older, a bit harder when they are younger.

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 12:54 AM on Mar. 16, 2010

  • We had planned to get pregnant with our third when our first two (twins) were 2, that way, by the time the baby came, if all worked out the way I had planned, the twins would be potty trained and I wouldn't have three in diapers. It didn't work out that way though, and when the twins were 10 months old, I was pregnant again.

    Answer by fallnangel93 at 6:25 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • I planned on conceiving when my son was about 1 year, but at his birthday party we got hit with the news that my BIL was getting married over seas this summer and I just don't want to travel internationally with pregnant, or with a new baby. So we're waiting until the end of the summer/fall. That means our son will be almost 3 by the time we have another - if we conceive right when we are hoping to.

    Answer by beckcorc at 8:04 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • It took us 6 years to finally get pregnant. When we had our first I was 30 and hubbys was 38. We didn't want an only child, but due to our age didn't think we had a lot of time. So, we left it up to chance and I got pregnant when our DD was 10 months old. I had our DS and again we left it to chance and I got pregant a third time when he was 10 months old. Now I have 3 kids (3 and a half yr old, 23 month old, and a 3 month old). I'm now on the mini pill and hoping we are done. I want my husband to get a vasectomy.

    I was breast feeding when I got pregnant the last 2 times.

    Answer by ThrivingMom at 9:54 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • We wanted our kids close together. We had some trouble getting pregnant with the first, so as soon as we were ready we started trying for the second. I got pregnant right away. My two oldest are 17 months apart. My MD wanted us to wait a little longer before the next one. The next two are 25 1/2 months apart. We are hoping for our 4th and last baby to be around 17-18 months apart from our 3rd. So, we will start trying this summer.

    Answer by mupt02 at 10:37 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • We just let nature decide. Well we had issue with birth control and stuff happened for the first 3. The 4th was semi planned and the 5th was just a big oops but we waited until the youngest was much older before getting a little careless, lol.
    They are 15 months, 13 months and 3 1/2 years apart. This last one will be a little over 4 years younger then #4.
    I didn't particularly like the 3 1/2 year spacing. At the time the kids were 3, 4 and 5. The oldest was in school so I had to go out to the bus stop twice a day and the kids still needed a lot of help with everything. And the 3yo wasn't potty trained (she was a pain in the butt about that). I found the first 3 to be much easier to deal with since I never got out of baby mode, there was just always another baby coming.
    Not sure how this one will go. The kids will be 10, 8 1/2, 7 1/2 and 4 when the baby is born so much more self-sufficient.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 10:54 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • I really didn't.

    Answer by salexander at 11:19 AM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • I didn't plan any spacing out, but I have a 9 year gap between the first two, it works well, I like that gap. My eldest is a great helper, and a good role model for my younger two, not much jealousy issues, either! Between my second two I have only 14 month gap, and I like that gap too! There are very few jealousy issues, and they are growing up best friends. They rarely fight over toys, and play very well together :P It was difficult for the first two months trying to find time for everyone, but since then everything has gotten way easier.

    Answer by wendy46121 at 12:34 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • I always thought I wanted my kids no more than 3 years apart. It didn't work out that way though and we didn't end up trying for our second until right after our first turned 5. There is almost 6 years age difference between my boys and I couldn't be happier. My first was in Kindergarten when his brother was born so I got all day while he was at school for 1 on 1 time with the baby. Not to mention he was old enough to understand what was going on, to ask questions about the things he didn't understand. He was already super independent. There have been no jealousy issues. Baby proofing was fairly easy because the oldest can pick up after himself pretty good. And the list goes on......

    Answer by Krysden at 12:53 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • We just didn't use any birth control and decided to let "nature take it's course". We have 2 "sets". The first 2 are 16 1/2 mos. apart, there's a 2 1/2 year space between #2 and #3 and then the younger 2 are 5 days shy of being 16 mos. apart. The only reason there's a 2 1/2 year space between #2 and #3, though, is because we lost a daughter in between #2 and #3....if she had been born on time she would have been 19 mo s. younger than #2 but she was still born 3 1/2 mos. before her due date. Our sons are now 23, 22, 19 and 18 and they love having brothers close in age and all are very close.


    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 2:13 PM on Mar. 15, 2010