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is there something wrong with putting focus on beauty for your children?

this just goes along with the beauty pagent question. a lot of moms said things like, "why would i want to put focus on beauty?" i just don't see how that is a bad thing. idk.

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:10 PM on Mar. 15, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (25)
  • I don't see it as a bad thing as long as that's not the only thing you focus on.

    Answer by LokisMama at 12:11 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • "why would i want to put focus on beauty?" YOU DON"T
    BECAUSE that may change but your soul and the beauty inside never changes.

    You should tell you kids they are beautiful because they are good inside.

    I have known parents that get angry if you tell their kids are beautiful they think they will get full of themselves. That is also wrong. People in general like to know if they are good looking and it is wrong not to tell your kids they are cute.

    Answer by gammie at 12:16 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • My daughter knows she is beautiful. She doesn't need me to tell her (although I do), because so many others are willing to tell her. However, beauty changes and fades. It can be harder to deal with inevitable changes if so much of your self worth is tied to your outer appearance.
    Letting them know that they have outer beauty is ok. But they also need to know that it will only get them so far in life if they don't also develop their minds, their social skills and kindness, and other talents they may have.

    Answer by mandaday at 12:20 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • Beauty isn't what matters in life... You grow old and it fades. Why would you focus on something like that solely, when you will only lose it and be so unhappy that you are no longer beautiful? This is placed in religion and beliefs... so I might add that vanity is a sin... and by VANITY I mean so totally obsessed with your looks and style that not a whole lot else matters. Obsession over just caring about looking nice. There is nothing wrong with wanting to have nice clothes and wear your hair and makeup nice. But when life is about looks... isn't that just sad?

    Answer by missbreezy214 at 12:36 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • my mother didn't tell me i was beautiful and a lot of other people did growing up. the one person that matters as a child never really told me that. and children do need to be told they are beautiful on the outside. self worth is tied to outer beauty even if we don't want it to be and i want my daughter to know she is beautiful on the outside. i put a lot of focus on making sure "she thinks" she is beautiful. out of all the other skills and talents she possess that is a major componentof self worth that shouldn't be overlooked. females especially need to feel like they are beautiful on the outside as well as in.


    Answer by KristaRene at 12:37 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • Because it's superficial. Because it's not an accomplishment, but an accident of birth. Because beauty in and of itself, is meaningless.

    I think the better question is why would you want to focus on it? It's not something that was achieved through hard work, but something that was bestowed on them through genetics. No one has any say in how beautiful they may or may not be. To glorify an attribute that was neither worked for, nor attributible to them is shallow. I prefer to reward my children for things they've accomplished, not for being "cute".

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:02 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • Beauty is subjective, fleeting and superficial!  I think putting focus on looking your best is more important for building self-esteem, confidence and a healthy attitude towards aging.


    Answer by beeky at 1:11 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • Because you're focusing on something superficial rather than the important thing which is their personality. Beauty isn't important to a kid.

    Answer by Imogine at 1:12 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • I think there is a huge difference between putting a child into a beauty pagent, which focuses ONLY on beauty, and how much you can "doll" yourself up....and showing your kids that taking care of yourself, so you always look presentable is going to help you in life.
    Having strong self esteem comes from within, no matter how we look on the outside. Beauty pagents are for the "beautiful" people on the OUTSIDE....I don't see much beauty on the inside in those type of things. If it were about that, there would be no need for makeup, dresses, hair-dos, bathing suits etc.

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 1:34 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • Why would you ever want to put the focus on the one thing a child cannot control? Are you trying to raise a shallow, neurotic mess?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

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