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Is this Typical preteen attitude?

I have a just turned 10 year old niece who's been very emotional and on edge here and there..it goes through spurts. She Sleeps everynight at her mom's house which is basically it though. The rest of the time she spends at my mom's house and since my sister has been a single mom going to school and working 1-2 jobs at a time, my mom has basically raised her and me and my husband have helped, well lately she just seems to be ungrateful. sunday was her and my mom's birthday and my sister brings her over with one of her friends and of course my niece paid no attention to the family and didn't say more than "oh thanks" for each gift which were a coach purse from our "rich" sister and me and my husband gave her our computer and she got clothes and books and they didn't stay for more than an hour.. Is this common when they have friends with? I think she's taking after my sister now but It really hurt us all..

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:36 PM on Mar. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • It's normal, but it isn't happening with my 10 year old. I've been talking to her for the last year about her pre-teen attitude and how it will have repercussions. If she chooses to act awful, she will be treated awful. Sounds like your niece needs some consequences directly related to her awful attitude. She will try anything to see what she can get away with. As pointed out by anon:28, she is not an adult, true, but that doesn't mean she can't be a well behaved young lady. Let's not give up just yet.
    Pnukey

    Answer by Pnukey at 6:08 PM on Mar. 16, 2010

  • OP: She's also beyond picky with food and gets edgy having to eat so she picks it apart and tells my mom its gross etc.. Then she'll spend all night in her Room with an attitude. my son is around her alot and I don't want him to be around this if it continues but my mom seems to think its normal crappy teenage behavior.. but she's 10.... not 14.... is she just acting like a brat or is this when the hormonal crap of girls start?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:38 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • From my experience with kids & teens yes this is normal, especially when they are with friends. The best thing to do would be to talk to her and let her know that her behavior was hurtful and to try to think of others
    CuteandCurvy

    Answer by CuteandCurvy at 5:40 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • Do you think as her Aunt, it would be over stepping? My sister is about as selfish and unapproachable as they come so it wouldn't help to talk to her ahead of time... its so sad,. this sweet little girl is being very rotten...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:43 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • She's 10....that's the start of PUBERTY with girls.
    Now, that being said....my daughter wasn't allowed to keep the attitude. We sent her outside to scream, yell, bitch, and moan. After that, she was a much better child. She's now 15 and while we occasionally get the eye roll, "why me", "do I have to", foot stomps, etc....it isn't all the time because we put a stop to it in the beginning.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 5:43 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • OP: I've talked to her about this about 3 different times telling her to go in her room or excuse herself stating she is just in a bad mood if she feels she's going to be hurtful or not be nice to grandma.. but then again, I am NOT her parent, the person who should be inforcing these things either.. Her mother is also ungrateful and rude so Its not a huge surprise. Its just sad I guess.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:46 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • 10 is the new 14 now- kids are getting younger and younger. I think that she should be shown that her behavior is not acceptable somehow, but that's up to who ever is in charge.
    My money is on hormones- your son could act just like that and worse possibly- who knows really?
    my relatives came up with a rule that I think is a good one- kids are expected to write thank - you notes for all of their gifts, and they can't use a gift until the note is written for it.

    feel free to send me the coach purse if she doesn't want it- :)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:48 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • yes it's normal but what did you want from a 10 yr old? She's not an adult. Don't expect her to act like one
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • As a fifth grade teacher to 10-11 year olds this is what I get on a daily basis! I think at this point they are trying out what they can get away with. It's about the same as when you three year old starts testing boundaries. I think as a parent, or aunt in your case, you have to put your foot down and let her know what is acceptable and what is not. IF you let it slide, she will just contune on the same path and probably get much worse. I wish you luck! I'm grateful I get to send all 22 of mine home each afternoon! This is not an easy age!
    Sonylena

    Answer by Sonylena at 9:21 PM on Mar. 15, 2010

  • She is a CHILD. Sit her down with all of you and explain that what she is doing and the way she acted hurt everyone's feelings.

    And tell her she better not act that way again or there will be consequences
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 1:10 AM on Mar. 17, 2010

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