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why did god give me my son?

i cant handle him. he is a miserable, miserable child. all he has ever done since birth is cry/scream all day. he is well taken care of/loved, plenty of food, outside play, etc. nothing ever makes him happy or satisfied. i often leave the store in tears b/c he tantrums the whole time and i cant even think while im shopping. i am a single mom so i am the only person who deals with this and i feel like i have lost all patience for him. i just dont understand why god would give me a child i cant handle. i dont know if anybody could handle him. bash all you want. i will only be taking supportive answers seriously. BTW he is not in daycare. we live with my mom so i am caring for my kids by myself from morning until bedtime.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:09 PM on Mar. 17, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (34)
  • You need to talk to his pediatrician about this. He may have developmental or psychological problems that can't get better without therapy or medications.
    SWasson

    Answer by SWasson at 3:11 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • I'm so sorry.... I wish I had some great advice for you.

    ((Big Hugs))
    VeronicaLee

    Answer by VeronicaLee at 3:11 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • why do you blame it on some god? he is your child give...you created him. I am not bashing. You need to learn how to deal with his behavior. Things usually get better but they wont if you are a push over
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 3:12 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • God didn't give you a child you can not handle...God gave you a child! The handling part is up to you! You're the Mom. Control your child. IMO
    mamaada

    Answer by mamaada at 3:12 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • Deffinately talk to the pediatrician. All kids can be deffiant and tempermental, strong willed, what have you. But if it is a daily thing then maybe there is an underlying issue. If you live with your mom, what does she say? Sometimes my mom's advice is wonderful
    MissHeidi0304

    Answer by MissHeidi0304 at 3:13 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • I think a parenting class is in order. Not because you are doing anything wrong, but because I think they are important for all parents, especially ones with difficult children. I would recommend the "Love and Logic" course. It is a great course that teaches children natural consequences. It really help us with our oldest child who was a handful.
    Big hugs Momma. Take a deep breath!
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 3:13 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • Maybe it is because he is home with you all the time and he is board. I really have no real answer for you but I have heard of children being this way. Have you spoke to you doctor about this? Maybe they could help you. Best of Luck to you! Raising children is one of the hardest things to do in this world! It takes a tough woman to admit to this! My thoughts and prayers are with you!
    jem102675

    Answer by jem102675 at 3:14 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • kids get out of control, especially when you dont have the patience, on a good day, i feel love for my daughter, just as you should with your son, but if everyday is a bad day for you, you need to take a break from parenting.. since you live with your mom ask if she can handel watching him for a weekend, while you go out and enjoy yourself, stay at another family members house, a freinds or a hotel, but rejuvinate your buttons and relax, single parenting is hard, but there is a reason for his tantrums... maybe he can feel how fustrated you are, or your yelling at him, maybe even punishing to much, try calming down... when im over bearing and to rough on my daughter even a slight raised voice, she becomes horrible and her behavior worsens and she acts like a brat..... if this doesnt work take him to a behavioralist and see what they say. ok.
    jlouise03

    Answer by jlouise03 at 3:28 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • I agree with the pareting class idea. Just to get some advice and strategies to work with him. Also, I like the idea of talking to your pediatrician.

    Also, know that parenting...especially single parenting is the HARDEST job you will ever do, that really has no coffee breaks and you cant quit. ;)

    all moms feel overwhelmed from time to time, just know this too shall pass. What I mean is that kids move from one stage to another so quickly that all you have to do it survive this one and he will change.

    Sorry you are having such a tough time..
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 3:29 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

  • You are brave to admit your feelings and I am glad to see no one has really bashed you so far. I agree that you need to get to the bottom of the cause for this- is there a behavioral problem, health problem, is something lacking for your son? You can handle your child, you just may not have the tools to do that yet because you don't know or understand exactly what you could be doing differently to help the situation. I'm not saying you are doing anything wrong, just that you haven't found or been given the right answers yet. Make it your mission to find those answers, for your sake and your sons. If he could tell you what he needs he would, since he can't you need to find those answers for the both of you. Talk to your dr, get a 2nd opinion if you need it, or a third. Check out every book from the library you can get your hands on, seek support (like you are doing here) and try different things as solutions. You can do this!
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 3:41 PM on Mar. 17, 2010

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