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I'm pregnant and my hubby....

Well I just found out I was pregnant yesterday and told my husband when he got home this will be our first together. I have one and he has three. He said he was happy if I was happy but he wasn't going to get his hopes up so that kinda hurt my feelings. He said his ex-wife had 3 miscarriages and they hurt really bad I just don't want to get my hopes up and the pregnancy tests be false or you miscarry. I was told it would be difficult to get pregnant cause of my cervix position but I was checked out really good lots of hormone tests and blood work I was told I was fine to go no problems. His ex-wife was told not to try and have anymore cause she wouldn't be able to carry full term and she could get hurt too. She was put on bc and refused to take them and had 3 mcs and the 4th finally stuck. So is he saying he isn't happy about it? I mean I'm confused all for it one min. and then doubting the next? I'm confused.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:36 PM on Mar. 18, 2010 in Pregnancy

Answers (10)
  • i think becasue in the past he got his hopes up about the pregnancies and they were miscarried, that it hurt him to much.. i think hes happy, but untill the baby is born, he may hold it in, hes just trying to be strong and not get hurt if he has to live through the loss of another one.. dont worry..
    jlouise03

    Answer by jlouise03 at 1:40 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • Men speak incorrectly to women. They don't usually understand that what they mean is not what we are hearing.
    He's worried about getting excited because he's been disappointed before. It's nothing against you, just him looking out for his own feelings and possibly yours too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:42 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I can say from experience, if he was trully not happy, that is what he would have said. To me it sounds like he is Really excitted but doesn't want to get to happy because of the past with his ex. As your pregnancy goes on he will come around. With each doctors visit, and each clean bill of health, he will find more and more comfort in expressing his happinies. Im so happy for you too! Don't worry, 40 weeks is a long time for him to find the courage to know that everything is going to be allright :)
    hate2ndchances

    Answer by hate2ndchances at 1:49 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • He seems to be a wait and see kinda guy from past history and who can blame him. Only time will tell for him. Take it one day at a time.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:50 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I agree with anon 1:42 - men are men- we do our best with them :)
    This is just his reaction now- give him a little time.
    Besides, that's why god created other women like on Cafe mom-
    come chat with us!

    Congratulations!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:52 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • sounds to me like he is anxious... trying to not get too excited based on past experiences with problems. i completely freaked when i found out i was pregnant recently - pregnancy has not always been a happy thing for me, plus on top of that i just turned 41, my daughter is about to be 19... hubby and i tried for a while to no avail, etc. i cried and yelled at my husband. we got in a big fight. we're both very excited now...
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 1:53 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • congrats figaro8895! I'm 39 and would love to be pregnant right now. does your 19 year old daughter know yet? keep us posted!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:27 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • well us ladies can say whatever it is we are thinking about this but in the end its his mind so i believe you should ask what he means hun. i really do hope things go well with you all.. good luck hun
    Tryin4GodsAngel

    Answer by Tryin4GodsAngel at 2:50 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • He did not handle this the right way but he's probably just trying to protect both of you from the pain he's experienced in the past.

    Tell him how you feel. He probably doesn't realize what he did.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:52 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • times have changed. a lot of people wait before telling relatives about a pregnancy- a lot of women didn't even tell their husbands until a certain time had passed.
    I think that Daddy is probably a bit in shock & maybe just needs to digest it for a bit- she only found out yesterday, I don't think pushing him for a different answer is going to help anything just yet.
    I still say give it a little time- maybe just a few days.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:02 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

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