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i want him to look at me like he did years ago...i need ideas

i know married love is different from the first infatuation crush stuff , but i want him to call me from work just too, and flirt on the phone, look at me as a beautiful woman and not just a wife. I bought thongs, i never wear them and he was too tired, i texted him flirty messages, he didn't flirt back, i have done other things too and told him things that would make me feel love.. now i just feel like i should go find attention else where, not to cheat, i would never , but go to a bar and let the men shower me with compliments... do you have any suggests that would help before i go off and get into trouble.. plus i was never a drinker and i am thinking maybe i would be happier if i was...

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:54 PM on Mar. 18, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • Here's what you do: You tell him every day how much you love and appreciate him. You mention every day one trait about him that you absolutely love. You compliment him in front of your children, his parents, and his friends. You thank him for taking out the trash or putting gas in the car. Every single day, you do one little something for him that is special just to him. You make his favorite meal or his favorite dessert. You greet him at the door every afternoon with a smile on your face and a big old kiss on the smacker. You let him know every day that of all the men on the planet, you would choose him again today. You do these things, and you will need a huge stick to beat the man away from you.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 6:39 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I think you are on the right track just pace yourself. Go out and flirt and get attention from other men and tell dh. Men love competition and he might straighten up if he thinks he will lose you. Wear those thongs out. If he doesn't appreciate them then someone else will.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:00 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • Um....I strongly disagree with the first comment. Flirting with other men and showing them your thongs will NOT make your marriage better, and any attention you DO get will be empty and purely sexual. BAD DECISION!

    Instead, take care of your husband. Don't just try to sexually get him going, rub his feet when he comes home from work. Have dinner ready, don't nag him. Maybe HE wants to be treated the way you treated him when you were first dating. Don't expect ANYTHING in return, just keep loving him as hard as you can. Eventually he'll respond. Hang in there.

    If you follow Jesus, I think some conversation with Him might be in order as well. :)
    Melissa823

    Answer by Melissa823 at 4:06 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • Your in a good spot,your the wife therefore theres no rules you can break,throw yourself all over him (your man and noone else) call him a special name,you call him at work,text him and tell him how much you love him,maybie at first he wont act flirtly but he cant do that too long,men get use to the comfort zone so its your job to snap him out of it.start slowly and dont go out and flirt with men,what is this going to make him think? that everytime something goes wrong HIS wife will go flirt with other men,that will be dumb move.Take over girlie he is yours.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:06 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I agree with the first comment- but I would take the husband along and let him see how much other men appreciate you-

    I don't think that admckenzie was suggesting that you go out and flash your thongs to guys-
    good luck-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I think if you went out flirting with other guys it would make things sooo much worse. It would upset your husband a great deal (or it would mine). It would probably make you feel guilty afterwards even if you didn't actually go through with anything. Men cannot read our minds. If we want something we have to be completely blunt and tell them! Just talk to your hubby about what it bothering you. Just be careful to not let your tone be threatening or demanding. He will probably get defensive if you do. If you want to make your marriage work, talk to him before you step outside your marriage. That isn't going to solve anything. Good luck!
    rlhall1980

    Answer by rlhall1980 at 4:28 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I know exactly how you feel. My husband doesn't ever tell me I am pretty or flirt with me. We have been together along time but I haven't let myself go and in fact in better shape now than before we got married. Try not to take it too personal, Just dress up for him sometimes and he may like it just not say anything.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:37 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • Well, men are selfish.. you can talk to him, show him and all that jazz a mill freakin times... and In most cases not gonna work. I suggest if none of that works and from what you said he hasn't, and you just beating a dead horse..... get divorce papers instead of just going out and cheating. JMHO.

    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 4:43 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • I agree with Soonmommy - I am married to the dead horse. Most guys become totally complacent and will NEVER put that much energy into your relationship again. They are lazy and would rather go hunt fresh game. Sorry
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

  • Men are visual creatures. Wear the thongs. Get some sexy things to wear to bed. Seduce him. He won't be able to ignore you. I've been married 11 years and I can't get my husband to keep his hands off me for 5 minutes even when I'm not dressed sexy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Mar. 18, 2010

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