MOm won't quit talking bad about my kids dad..

I agree with you. It's not fair to your children. He's still their father. They need to be allowed to form an opinion for themselves. Besides, how are they to feel about themselves if they are told their father is a loser?

I think you are right, and your mother is wrong. Ask her not to say things like that anymore. Say, "I know what you're saying is true, but the girls do not need to hear that. They need to learn on their own."

Your mom needs to keep her mouth shut no matter what she feels. It is up to you to decide what your kids hear about their father and when. If you choose not to tell them anything and let them decide then that is what you do. Not your mom's decision no matter what she thinks or feels.

I agree my mom does that about my dh all the time. Yeah he irritates me and I may say things when I'm pissed but never in-front of the kids. It's like playing monkey in the middle using the kids as the monkey.

I heard for years that my bio dad was a jerk, liar, loser, moron, a hole, dirt bag and the list goes on. He was a jerk he abandoned us and never came back. It still hurt when we heard that because sometimes my mom would comment on how much like him we were. So we heard you are like your dad and since he was a jerk we must be too. We already felt it was our fault he left and then we felt we were like him and wanted to crawl in holes and be left alone.

Your mom is wrong and should keep her trap shut her words will wound your children even if they are true. To me it is mental abuse and it hurt as bad as my bio dad walking out. I am glad you don't do this but your mom needs to stop. Tell her if she continues her time with the kids will be limited. Their little spirits need to be protected you don't want them feeling like they are bad like daddy.

THAT'S NOT fair to the kids at all.. your mom is wrong. Its too much for them to take or even deal with, especially now. They can be gentlely explained to about the situation when they are older.. that's sad

I'd tell her to stop bringing him up. It makes them think of him and if you don't want him involved in their lives then keep him out of their mind. Mom is going to make them want to meet him. Kids don't always hear the bad words, they hear that they have a dad and want to know him. So she needs to keep her thoughts on something else other than him. Why would she even talk about him anyway if she doesn't like him? Tell her to pretend he doesn't exist and focus on loving the kids and making them happy

I would definately be having a serious talk with my mom. if it wasn't your mom, i would probably tell them that if they couldn't keep themselves from talking like that in front of my kids, they would no longer be welcome around my kids. and i might even tell my mom how seriously I felt about it.