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Why do men change?

why is is that when you meet a man he seems to be true and himself, but later down the line they change into what you dont want. You confront them for the sake of your relationship and they say they are trying to be the man that they were in the beginning but you must be patient. WHy must we as women deal with this and why do they feel we must wait on them? and is it even worth the wait?

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mrscoty

Asked by mrscoty at 3:09 PM on Mar. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • LOL that's when you change also give him a good dose of what you feel

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:10 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • I always have believed that the "true self" is who they are AFTER they get with you. They haven't really changed because who they presented themselves as when you first meet, well that's not who they really are. I am very thankful that my husband is exactly the same today as when I met him.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 3:12 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • Women do the same thing. Don't act like you haven't changed a bit.
    In the beginning of the relationship, both parties are still trying to impress. When they become more comfortable, they relax into their 'real selves.'
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:13 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • And besides, people are constantly changing. That's just what we do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:14 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • No one changes. Of course in the beginning everything is perfect because you're both trying to represent your best sides to keep the other person from walking out. Once you're married or have been together long enough you don't have to make the effort the keep the other person from leaving. You just have to tolerate what's really wrong with them and try to figure out how to work with it. You can't mold anyone to be who you want them to be or else they will resent you for the rest of their life or eventually break up with you. So...maybe you should tell him what bothers you most about him and try to work things out instead of writing him off as becoming an asshole you didn't want.
    Imogine

    Answer by Imogine at 3:14 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • The answer from my experience is not worth it to wait. This is a straight up lie. I have had this happen over and over. Men tell you what you want to hear, or try to be the person they think you want. But it doesn't last because they are odvisiouly not that person and you can only fake for so long.
    my2kids312

    Answer by my2kids312 at 3:15 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • The guy they are when you very first meet isn't their true self, you have that backwards. Once you ahve been with them longer and they have gotten comfortable that jerk who farts in your bed and laughs THAT is the true person you are with. It's not fair to expect them to always be on their best behavior like they are when you first start dating.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:15 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • what is he doing specifically? just curious-
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:34 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • They are NOT themselves when you meet them. They are putting on an act to sell themselves then when you get attached they show the real them later.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:54 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

  • Anon :15 - LOL, I'm sorry, that cracked me up about the guy farting in the bed and laughing. I'm serious, my husband did it from the start. There was no trying to impress me right from the beginning! I think that's why I fell in love with him though.
    TarLion

    Answer by TarLion at 5:05 PM on Mar. 22, 2010

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