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My friend does not use her child's car seat properly...

My child is almost 22 months old, and is still rear-facing. I make sure the car seat is installed properly and I restrain him properly. My friend's child is a month older than my child and has made the choice to forward face her child at 1 year and 20 lbs. I am fine with that. However, I do have a problem with the straps being so loose that I can fit my arm behind them and the bar being at her belly! There is nothing that is going to keep that child in place in the event of a car crash! The child is barely 25lbs and she wants to put her child in a booster seat. I have spoke to her about this many times, she says she does not want her child to cry so she does not tighten the straps. WTH! I'm at my wit's end... I love that child as if she was a part of my own family. I've tried to educate the mother and the family. Should I just ignore it or what should I do? I wouldn't be okay with myself if they get into a car crash.


Asked by Anonymous at 1:30 PM on Mar. 23, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • And by some of the replies you now have an understanding as to why America sucks so bad these days...NO ONE GIVES A RIP ABOUT ANYONE ELSE ANYMORE!!!! Everyone is all for themselves, and sometimes even their own children bare the brunt of the selfishness! This is about a childs life here ladies! A child the OP clearly loves! This isn't ERF vs FF, this is PROPER car seat IS a law to use one the right way.

    OP: some of the helpful ladies here have posted some amazing (and heart breaking!) videos for you to look up. Even if you've showed them to your friend, do it again! Her child is going to be EJECTED from her car seat if her mother gets into a car accident! And for the record, her child is LAWFULLY TOO YOUNG for a booster! Education is all you can do. Have a serious sit down discussion with her. Until she gets it. And hopefully she doesn't learn her lesson the hard way.

    Answer by milfalicious08 at 1:42 AM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • worry about your own kid

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:33 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • Wow... I don't understand that woman's attitude at all. I don't know what the best way to proceed is, but I know for sure I wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut... Maybe you can print out some articles about the importance of properly using car seats?

    Answer by Anouck at 1:33 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • unfortunately, all you can do is educate her of the dangers and show her the proper fit...the rest is up to her

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 1:33 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • OP: Whenever I am behind the wheel and I have my friend's child in my car, I make sure she is buckled in the right way. My friend's daughter does put up a fit. I ignore her and make my friend ignore her. I don't want her seriously injuried or worse in the event of a car crash. But I cannot control what is going on when my friend is driving her daughter and such. I don't think her parents care either... she lives with her mom and dad. There have been occassions where they rode with the baby in the back seat using adult seat belt because there were no room for the car seat or whatever excuse. SO unacceptable! I don't want to start drama with the family or get them in any trouble... but I have no clue what I am to do. She is my best friend and I've known her since I was a small child so she's more like a sister than anything. Please excuse my typos, I'm typing this with my son on my lap.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:35 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • There is nothing you can do but pray nothing happens. My sister was the same with her four kids, but she let them put their seat belts on themselves. All of the straps were twisted and half the time the seats were not connected to the car correctly. It didn't matter how many times I told her it was unsafe, she wouldn't fix it. She said, well they are old enough, they know how to do it. So whenever I rode with her I would adjust all of their seat belts and readjust their seats so they were in properly. She is a good mom and this was the only thing I know of that she slacked on. But it still drove me crazy.

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 1:35 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • welll if she gets in an accident and her kid dies. make sure you let her know it was her fault. or if she does put the child in a booster or even know just call the cops on her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:36 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • OP: I've shown her crash test videos and done all I can to educate. Does anyone have any good sites I might not be aware of? Or any ideas how I can scare some senses into her? That baby is going to be badly harmed one day.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:36 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • wanna know bad? i picked up my frienfds kid and she brought his CS and sat him buckled him,lucky for her kid before i drove off i noticed she didnt buckle him to my CAR! yeah thats right and when i told her she said,who cares its just for that is a HORRIBLE CARELESS MOM. I was so mad.

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 1:37 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • google

    kyle david miller
    and Belle's gift

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 1:37 PM on Mar. 23, 2010