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Is it wrong of me to not be her friend if she gets an abortion?Ok so ive been friends with this girl for about 3 years now when we first started hanging out she was 16 and pregnant ...blah blah blah after her son was born she moved to nevada with her sons father and from what shes told me they constantly fight

(him her and his family) also he beats her up and when he does his family just blows it off like it doesnt matter so anyways beyond that...she called me the other day and tells me shes pregnant..and the first thing im thinking is y r u even having sex with the guy that hits u..unprotected and without birth control and then she goes on and on about how she doesnt know if she wants the baby or if she can handle it and all this other bs..and she makes it seem like she might get an abortion

which I am obviously anti abortion i dont believe in it never will and i choose not to associate with people who do..so am i over reacting if i choose not to talk to her anymore ? i dont even want to get in her business and preach to her it would just make me sick to talk to her! so opinions?answers?

bashers! and pro choicers..I DONT CARE wat u have to say about abortion i want answers for my question specifically!also sorry about the typo

 
mommy16love

Asked by mommy16love at 10:48 PM on Mar. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Level 17 (4,321 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • I couldn't be friends with a murderer. It says so much about their character if they can just kill an innocent child. I don't blame you and would respond the same way. However, I think I would read her the riot act.
    ArkTech

    Answer by ArkTech at 10:50 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • I think you'd be a horrible person if you stopped being friends with her for it. Have you never heard of rape? A woman can be raped regardless of her relationship status with the rapist. Maybe instead of being a judgmental jerk you should support her and start talking to her about getting counseling and going to a woman's shelter so she can get away from the abuse. Why would you WANT her to bring another child into the world when she's in that kind of situation? You know that guy could end up beating that baby to death- making the death slow and painful instead of never letting the baby exist? Sorry, but I think a child suffering is way worse.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • I really don't think it's any of your business. Just because you are against aborthion doesn't mean you should judge those who do it. You say you don't want to be bashed for how you feel, why should she be bashed for how she feels? It does sound like there are other reasons she may not be a good friend to have around, maybe the abortion thing is just the final straw and you shouldn't be friends. But I wouldn't let a difference in opinion about a very personal issue like abortion be the reason you end things. You haven't walked a day in her shoes and don't know the whole story
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • Well your frustration is understandable and it is hard to be friends with someone who is destroying themself. Have you tried to tell her kind of nicely how you feel? I do believe a good friend helps out each other through ups and downs but maybe this is just too much for you and you can not see past it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:54 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • while i agree with you, I think right now what she needs is support and if you, as her friend, abandon her, I think that would push her even more towards an abortion because she would have less people to depend on. Offer her what help you can and see what happens. if she ultimately does it, you know you've done everything you can. While I am anti abortion, I hope she does not bring a child into her current situation. the last thing we need is another child in an abusive situation, which is exactly what will happen if she doesn't get her head on straight and get out of it before this baby is born.
    mhaney03

    Answer by mhaney03 at 10:57 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • umm it is her choice to stay with him her mom has begged and begged her to come back her in live in a stable safe home u cant help someone who doesnt want help!!!! and as for the rape! believe me it wasnt rape she chose to have that life shes a dumb girl who cant even get on birth control i knew after i had my daughter i was going to be celibate and i still got birth control at my 6 week check up!!! its not my fault she god damn irresponsible and im not going to associate with someone who is like that it makes me sick...AND BTW ME NOT TALKING TO HER IS NOT GETTING IN HER BUSINESS ME NOT TALKING TO HER IS ALSDO NOT JUDGING HER IM JUST GOING TO BE DONE WITH HER SO ANON PLEASE READ MORE CAREFULLY NEXT TIME U ANSWER A QUESTION!
    mommy16love

    Answer by mommy16love at 10:59 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • I think you have every right to do what you have talked about. Abandon her in her time of need because she is not your clone and does not believe the way you do. It's fine.

    But karma is a bitch shared by all. You are not a very good friend to this girl and I don't mean if you stop talking to her. Your last post shows that you are not nor have you ever been her friend and it's my guess you don't have the capacity to have any kind of compassion for anyone other than yourself. I'm also thinking your quite young and have a lot of experiences in front of you.

    When karma hits and you find yourself completely alone when you need someone most, think back on this situation and know that you earned everything you get.

    Anti-abortion is not supposed to mean that you are anti-human.
    heatheryn

    Answer by heatheryn at 11:12 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • Wow! First, if you're going to post a question about something as serious as abortion and abuse and strongly voice your opinion, only be prepared when others voice theirs. If you don't want to hear from us pro-choicer's then don't post it in a public forum, go to a pro-life group. As for you and should you be friends with her or whatever your question was...I think she's better off to not have you in her life. If what you say is the truth and she is getting abused by her SO, then why should she take it from you too? Yes, verbal abuse is abuse. A friend should be supportive and honest and trusting and caring. None of the things that you have said about your so-called "friend" makes me believe that you are any of those things. If you thought she was a "dumb girl" and disagreed with her lifestyle choices, why, after 3 years, are you still even talking to her?
    clhadley

    Answer by clhadley at 11:19 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • Be her friend, regardless of her decision. It's her body.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:37 PM on Mar. 23, 2010

  • You're not her friend, and never have been. You can start being her friend now, and love her and help her, or you can abandon her. She needs all the help and support she can get.
    popcornlover

    Answer by popcornlover at 12:53 AM on Mar. 24, 2010

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