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What would you pay first? Especially since he treats me poorly.

My dh is making no money. He owes child support and has credit card debt and a car payment.
I have to pay the mortgage, utilities, my car payment, groceries and other household stuff. I am trying to keep roof over our heads. I don't feel I should have to use my child support to keep his current. I have pleaded with him to get his support lowered. He has not. He starts a new job soon but it will only be enough to cover is child support. He still cannot help me pay any household bills. It has been very hard to take on all responsibilities but I have managed. I am trying to stay with him through better or worse but he continues to act like it is no big deal and keeps expecting more. He says if I don't pay his child support he will end up in jail. I am trying ....but can't keep the utilities on if I pay his child support.


Asked by Anonymous at 9:41 PM on Mar. 24, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • My bills and if i could i would put something on his child support. just to keep him from going to jail but if he treat you like crap then F him and keeping him outta jail. the man is supposed to be the provider

    Answer by jazmya_mom at 12:52 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • He's taking advantage of you, and sounds like a complete loser. I'd say I'm sorry to be harsh, but I'm really not.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • IMO, you do what you need to do in order to care for you and your children...supporting his children is his responsibility and maybe he just needs some tough love...if he does wind up in jail, maybe then he'll start taking it a little more's not fair for you to pay every single bill AND have to decide which bill to pass up just to pay child support for him. Good luck with everything.

    Answer by JessicaNelson21 at 9:45 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • If he were working, I might help with 50%. If he's not working, his child support is not your responsibility. Don't allow yourself to be guilt tripped or manipulated.

    Answer by Ewadun at 9:46 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • Well lets look at it logically, All the money coming into the house is yours so you pay your stuff and keep the utilities on. If he falls behind in cs they will arrest him he will go to jail and maybe just maybe he will learn a lesson and lower his support when he loses a job so he won't get so damn far behind and maybe he will work harder at getting a job for his unemployed ass. By paying his cs your just enabling him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:46 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • Girl, his butt would be in jail. He made those babies not you , why are you paying for them? .He has just found a sucker. Sorry I am not trying to be ugly. What is he good for them, the sex can't be that good. You need to move on and get someone who will treat you like you should be treated. You are taking care of the house, the bills the kids and everything. That just really makes me mad I hate for a no good use a woman, he's using the love he knows you have for him and just taking advantage. I hate that. I've had guys like that before and I will not ever put up with that again.....Sorry I sort of went off there for a moment....I'm okay

    Answer by my2kids312 at 9:47 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • kick his ass out - you will save money by not feeding him or paying his cs.

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 10:02 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • mortgage first! (I'm a BTDT, now single mom)

    Answer by VeronicaLee at 10:07 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • That child support is HIS responsibility, not yours.
    He is taking advantage of you.
    You need to pay your Mortgage first. Period. You need to keep a roof over you and your child's head. His responsibility is on him. You shouldn't have to burdon everything on your shoulders. He deserves to sit in jail if he cannot man up and own up to his responsibility. Do not do it for him. You have YOUR repsonsibilities that do not include HIS child support.

    Kick him out. He doesn't deserve you.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:37 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • He won't go to jail if he goes back and gets it temporarily lowered. He can go 3 months before he goes to jail.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:04 PM on Mar. 24, 2010