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help with tantrums?

My 16 month old is starting to want to be independent with everything. And I try to encourage it. But if I take something away like the remote he has recently started throwing fits where he will scream and try to slap at me. I was told to just ignore it. I will not slap his hand or anything because this will encourage him that hitting is ok when its not. But just need some ideas on what other moms do to find out what is right for us.

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ashtonjames

Asked by ashtonjames at 10:26 PM on Mar. 24, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 5 (96 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • i try to ignore it. but if it gets to bad i put my dd in her room and tell her that until she stops she has to be by herself. even if she gets distracted and starts playing with a toy or something, it got her to stop.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:30 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • Some one mentioned to me to put him in his crib for just a min or two for a time out, but I dont want him thinking that he is being punished when I put him down for a nap or to bed.
    ashtonjames

    Answer by ashtonjames at 10:34 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • you could try super nany style and get a chair or just try standing him in a corner.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:35 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • When my daughter was two I went through the same thing. When she hit I would say "ouch that hurts. Would you like it if someone hit you?" She eventually got the hint and quit. I am very much like you that I will not slap my kids' hands. I agree that hitting your child makes them think it is ok. When she would throw herself on the ground and kick and scream I never yelled at her because I thought it would send the message in a negative way. I would very calmly tell her that that is not the way to get what she wants and that when she was finished then come talk to me about it. After a few seconds she would be done and then come over to me and calmly talk about it. Her tantrums only lasted a few months, so I think this approach worked well for my child. Good luck finding a solution that works well for the two of you.
    hostlerak

    Answer by hostlerak at 10:36 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • Walk away.

    When you get into another room, just for fun, play tantrum peek a boo It really is quite entertaining. Most kids will stop screaming and stuff if no one is there to watch, so when they see you peek around the corner, they start up again, and stop when you leave. I did that to my son when he was little. It was pretty funny. I could peek around the corner as many as 10 times. It was like puppeteering. Sometimes he would just follow me down the hall. I have a 4 year old here that throws tantrums, and he is used to getting attention from them. I ignored his tantrum, and he got really frustrated and confused. He finally calmly walked up to my DH and asked, "[DH], what's wrong with Erica? Why isn't she looking at me cry?" LOL poor kid. He doesn't try to get my attention with tantrums anymore though.
    3gifts.from.god

    Answer by 3gifts.from.god at 11:51 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • It is a hard age the "terrible 2's start anywhere after one and can go until almost 4. I believe that you try what works best for you. Thats means you try all the things and see what see responds to the best. I have 4 children and 2 are the same and the other 2 are the same basically. But 2 of them are a little head strong and would through fits and kick and scream and even hit are bite me.. And when I walked out of the room and tried to ignored him he would come to the room I was in and start all over there. I tried to talk to him, put him a tim out chair, But for 1 of these 2 I actually had to pop his bottom or his hand enough to get his attention and tell him NO! Do not do that or he will get another spanking. This worked. but my other head strong one, just talking firmly to him and letting him know that it was not exceptable for that kind of behavior and putting him continiously back in the time out chair worked.
    flboomerang

    Answer by flboomerang at 11:57 PM on Mar. 24, 2010

  • This may not be age appropriate for your 16month old. Both my children were already talking up a storm at that age and if they chose to try throwing a tantrum I would stop what I was doing and fix them with a curious look and when they would quiet down a bit I'd say "Are you having a tantrum?" Once they would answer me and regardless of the answer I'd say "Okay, I was just wondering" and then I'd walk off like nothing unusual was happening which would usually leave them with their jaw hanging open and the tantrum forgotten. If you bring to their attention that you've noticed their behavior, and gently let them know that it's not pushing any of your buttons and obviously not going to get them their way. The tantrum approach losses it's appeal.
    4theloveofmy2

    Answer by 4theloveofmy2 at 12:05 AM on Mar. 25, 2010

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