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Ex-Man whore

My fiance used to be a guy that...
Well... was a Lady's man.
He's changed, I remember him in Highschool, and he's nothing like that immature jock I was repulsed by.
But, when we're out together, and you get about 5 different FRANTIC approaches from females, who just want to say hello, or get a hug, or even get their little 30 second flirting on in just short of 2 hours.
I have to wonder whether I want to get into a marriage where my husband is WELL KNOWN for his WELL KNOWN penis.

When a girl walks up to him, it's hard to wonder whether he's slept with them, and it's hard to think about when I see them talking.
Sometimes I think about moving to the City, where I won't think about it.

Am I wrong?

Bashers, please don't reply to this. I'm already in a down frame of thinking.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on Mar. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • mine isn't an ex man whore, he's still a man whore and he's in his 50's! they never stop being a man whore even if only in their mind. not bashing, just saying. notice if he closes his eyes during sex. if so, he's not with you mentally.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:56 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Anon, that's bull. I close my eyes during sex just because I'm enjoying the moment, not because I'm fantasizing that my husband is someone else. That's some stupid reasoning.

    OP, my husband was that guy too (minus the jock part, he was only ever a runner and lifted weights). We've moved from where we used to live, but I still see women looking at him like that. But it gives me a little bit of an ego boost because I know he's mine, and that well known penis of his is now only brought out in my bed. I have gotten what all those others lusted over, and I know that's not going to change.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:01 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • "notice if he closes his eyes during sex. if so, he's not with you mentally. "

    Okay, I just have to jump in and say that is NOT true. I close my eyes during sex because it enhances the feelings, not because I'm not "mentally there."

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:02 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • My husband was also "well known" before we got together, and there are still some women who wish they could know him like they used to, but he comes home to me, when he's looking for a good time, it's with me, and I'm the only one who gets to "know" him these days. He's still approached sometimes but he doesn't flirt back, he's polite but that's where it ends, so IMO they can change their ways, and if it's something that bothers you, just think of it this way, you have what they want, and what they want, wants you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • don't commit to something you aren't 100% comfortable with. and if you do want to commit to him, address your concerns directly with him, and don't sugarcoat it. he needs to know exactly what you're thinking if you are planning on making any lifetime commitments. communication is key. if all these women coming up to him make you uncofortable, tell him. you might seem jealous, but at least he'll know how you're feeling and you'll find out if he's willing to accomodate you so you won't have to worry about his reputation & deal with insecurity.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:04 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Thats not true!!!! A lot of people close their eyes during sex for different reasons. I once heard it compared to when eating a piece of chocolate cake you close your eyes and enjoy it. Some people just can't handle staring somebody down while in the act. In 11 years I have never kept my eyes open during sex and it has nothing to do with imagining somebody else.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • I agree w/ anon. 4:03, if he's not flirting back you have nothing to worry about !

    My DH is not a flirter, but he did date A LOT of women before we got together, and because he does not flirt, I am just proud of having landed a desireable guy.
    Women may look and try to flirt, but seeing how he handles that, put me @ ease very early in the relationship, and I know I don't have to worry about that :-)

    Answer by Nynne at 4:26 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • I don't think you will ever be able to trust him the way a woman wants to trust her husband. I also know that when a man has slept with that many different women, he has given them more of himself than just his penis. He has in many ways bonded with every single one of them. He has shared special moments with each and every one and he will never be able to get those moments out of his mind, barring an extreme miracle. Marriage is way too important a commitment to make it to someone who has that much history of which you were not a part. I'd throw this one back and move to another fishing hole.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:56 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • I have to say that if you don't have trust in your fiance, that should reason enough not to get married. When my husband and I first met, he knew I was a huge flirt. It's all talk. And honestly, when we'd go out on a date, he would see me being flirty, and enjoy it. Not because he wanted to watch me have sex with another man or whatever, but because he knew that I was his and I was going home with him and no one else.

    BTW....flirty by nature. Just my personality, honest.

    I would tell you that if he does something that crosses the line, talk to him later about it. If you don't tell him what your boundaries are, he won't know. Trust, trust, trust! That is key!!!

    And another thing, if he's "well known for his well known penis" there are going to be women that are just whores themselves and are jealous that YOU have him and will try to flirt just to piss you off.

    Answer by clhadley at 5:44 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • my husband is an ex man whore. he was really really well known for his member and there were certain places in town we weren't allowed to go or a fight would start just because i came in with him and had slept with someone there or something. he has a few children by a few different women but i don't judge people on their pasts. we moved to another state, his decision, not mine & noone knows him or his penis here except me and we haven't been happier in our entire life.

    Answer by 2sdayDayli at 6:48 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

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