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How do you guys deal with your kids homework?

Do you force your child to sit in his/her room until it's done? Do you sit next to them & walk them through it? How do you deal?

DD is is 8 & in 2nd grade. I personally think she has WAY too much homeworke for her age. I had none in second grade, & still managed to learn a lot. Anyhow, she struggles VERY hard to focus on homework . If i let her do it alone, it won't get done. She'll sit there until bed time, no matter how much i tell her to get it done. I KNOW she knows how to do it, but she acts like she does not. SO, i eventually HAVE to sit next to her & walk her thoguth it. Which is what she wants. I feel like i lost the battle. How do you get your child to do their homework & actually do it peacfully? I'm going nuts here. Our whole house hold is now in a foul mood just because of DD's 2nd grade homework. Every one is overly frustrated, i don't get why she can't just get it done! She does work at school, why not home?

Answer Question

Asked by samurai_chica at 7:30 PM on Mar. 25, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 35 (74,081 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • I dont really have any problems honestly, my 3rd grader brings home a folder on monday, all work is due on Thursday. Our rule is get it done on monday and tuesday, he comes home gets a snack and gets to work. My 6th grader gets most of his done in study hall so what homework actually comes home is very little and he gets it done as soon as he gets home. My daughter is a kinder and they only get homework a couple times a month and it is a parent involved assignment normally so we do it together, recently they started bringing home books so she does have to read every night and we have to sign off that she completed it.

    We set firm rules from the start and my kids have always known this is how it is, they come home get their snack and sit at the kitchen table to do homework while i cook dinner, on the nights we have activities they get what they can done before we leave.

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 7:36 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • My nine year old (4th grade) doesn't have a ton of home work but she had loads in 2nd and 3rd grade. My first grader doesn't get too much yet.

    They sit at the table or the kitchen counter and do their homework, I do not sit with them, but our floor plan is open so I'm around. I am also available for any questions.

    I would let them do homework in their room but only because i don't have an issue getting them to do it. So, I wouldn't let your daughter until she proved she could handle it.

    Also in our house if they didn't do it there would be some strict consequences. I'd let them earn the crappy grade they'd get for not completing the work, take them in to a meeting with the teacher to hear exactly what's going to happen if they don't do it and again punishment for not and a reward for doing it.

    My guess is she is testing you.

    Answer by heatheryn at 7:36 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • i think its a good idea to sit next to her. it shows u support her and want to make sure she is doing a good job. idk what her personalilty is like outside of the homework situation, but if she has similar issues in other situations, she may have a learning disability. does she have trouble reading, but understand the subject matter? (maybe dyslexia) can she not focus on one task for more than a few mins, constantly moving, ect? (maybe adhd) its hard to say without knowing her personally, but talk to her calmly and explain how u feel and what u want her to do. good luck.

    Answer by Phippsandrea at 7:36 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Are you POSITIVE your child can do the work on her own? IMO she's showing signs of struggle on the assignments. Maybe it would be best if you sat with her right away, and went over the assignment with her, putting her mind at ease about getting it done.


    Answer by Anonymous at 7:37 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • I would give her a reasonable time after she gets home to have a snack and decompress, maybe start homework after dinner. Then I would give her a reasonable time to have each page completed, say 20 mins. If she isnt done in that time, theres a consequence, if she is, maybe do a reward chart. Make sure she knows what she's doing before you start, but dont walk her through each individual problem. Then set her to it and dont give her any more attention. Stick to the consequence for not getting it know your kid best and what will best motivate her.

    Good luck...homework battles are the bane of my existance with 5 kids...if you get this out of the way early, maybe you wont be fighting your 13 year old in jr high, like I

    Answer by Tarinia at 7:39 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Phipps, i honestly think she may have a learning disability, which is kind of hard to admit. She is very bright & gifted in drawing & music. she can draw 100 X better than anyone in her grade. She can also teach herself music by ear. She is great at those things...but yeah.... she cannot focuss on something she does not want to be doing. She is not at all hyper active though, she is very calm. She cannot focus on a task for more than a few minutes (unless it's art/music related)

    She is very sweet, emotional, caring, compassionate, artistic & wonderful ALL OVER....until it's time to do homework. I want to cry sometimes when i think "should she be on meds?" I'm so against ADHD meds, but how do i get her to focus????

    Answer by samurai_chica at 7:45 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • I will sit with my children and make sure they know what needs to be done and then if they are doing well on there own then when they finish they have me check it over. It gets done at the kitchen table, i don't allow them to do it in there room cause they off track so sitting down with them and doing the first few questions or whatever with then and then we go from there. Try starting out with sitting down with them and then see what happens. You may also want to speak the teacher and other parents in the class to see what they think about the homework per night.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:46 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • "Are you POSITIVE your child can do the work on her own"

    yes, i am. Becasue i have to sit with her, i see that she actually knows what she is doing. It's just getting her to focus on doing it that is the problem. If there is a flake of dust next to her, she will find a way to mess with it instead of looking at her math problem. Or she'll start a problem, then go to lala land & totally fprget the problem she was doing.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 7:47 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Honestly, I'd just sit with her and work through it, one problem at a time, w/o giving any answers of course, to help keep her focused. Homework is totally stupid anyway, so it's ok if she gets help if needed. I taught for 9 years and always hated giving homework.

    Answer by Pnukey at 7:53 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Thanks pnuky. Dad seems to think that we should be training her to do it on her own, when i think sitting with her works better. All i know, is that it gets her to focus better. Dad thinks that i am not really helping, by helping. He thinks she should be able to do it on her own, so i get torn emotions about it. I will sit with her from now on though. If it works for us, then why not? I don't giver her the answers, so i don't see how that is a problem. Thanks guys!


    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:04 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

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