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Do you ever feel...??

Do you ever feel as if you spend sooo much time caring for your children that you feel as if you don't show them you love them enough?

I know this may sound strange and I said this when my first son was just born too..

But sometimes I feel as if I spend so much time caring for my children that I don't actually sit down and enjoy them?! Between housework, diaper changes, making meals, I go to school full time (on-line, tho), laundry, and everything else that a mother's life entails. I mean I know I love my children(more than anything in the world...) But somedays, I feel like I almost rush the days, and they sometimes just go by without meaning. Don't get me wrong I spend time with my boys together, and seperately(when i can)... uhh. I just need feedback on this one. Thx.

Answer Question
 
NickysMomma888

Asked by NickysMomma888 at 10:32 PM on Mar. 25, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Did I mention I have a two month old and a twenty month old :)
    NickysMomma888

    Answer by NickysMomma888 at 10:33 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Hell, I have a 14y/o and work full-time and I am single. I can even relate. LOL
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 10:35 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Oh wow mama, your babies are so little, my two oldest were the same age apart as yours, and all I can tell you is looking back, it is a blur in my mind, like you said, all the diaper changes and feedings, and desperation for sleep and peace and quiet. I was a single mom at that time as well, my husband left cuz he couldn't handle it. I so know what you are going through. I can't imagine trying to go to school AND take care of two babies. You are supermom!!!
    When your kids get older, you will have so much more time to enjoy them. Every mom gets overwhelmed, no matter what. It's the hardest job in the world! Just try to remind yourself that this is only a phase in your life and it will change. Your kids will become independent, you will finish school, and start to reap the rewards of being a great mom. God bless you, and lots of hugs to you!! Nurture yourself. :)
    JackieGirl007

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 10:40 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Oh honey. I know what you mean. I try my best to get down on the floor and play with my 17mo old. But somedays it's so rough to do it.. or i'm feeling like poo (i'm 26 weeks pregnant with our 2nd) .. so yeah sometimes I really feel bad.. But you can only do so much..
    Somedays when it's real nice outside .. I'll go outside and spend hours out there.. forget the laundry, the dishes, and all other cleaning... it can wait - but your children grow so quickly... enjoy every precious moment you can.. they won't always want to play or do special thing's together.. before we know it.. they'll be bosses teenagers who think they know it all and want nothing to do with us! LOL!!!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:41 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • I know exactly what you mean. I feel the same way.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:49 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • i have a 5, 4 and a 2 yr old. i get disapproving looks because my oldest 2 have not yet been to school, and this is exactly why i made that choice. i think all mothers would have more time if they could wish for anything. i spend all day every day in the company of my children, yet i feel as though i never actually spend time with them. but don't worry. your feelings just prove how much you are willing to sacrifice for the things that matter most. your children are too little to put it into words, but trust they fully understand your devotion to them. they won't remember you being so busy with laundry that you couldn't do a puzzle, but they will remember how good it felt to help match the socks! they wont remember the countless dishes you washed, but they'll remember that you made their favorite dinner. you feel like you didn't spend time with them today, but they know better. i promise they do!

    bestmommyeber

    Answer by bestmommyeber at 10:53 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Yes, I think many moms feel this way....but in reality, everything you do for them and with them...just making their home a pleasant place to be, etc. IS showing them that you love them. They are so much a part of your life....that is what being a mom is, really!
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 11:12 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • No, because I don't push myself to my limits. If my son (18 months) wants to play, then I throw the dirty laundry in the laundry room and I go play with him. If he wants me to sit and cuddle with him then the dirty dishes can wait an hour. My children comes first and that doesn't just mean in caring for them. That means playing and cuddling with them too. Housework is not the first priority to me. I do chores when my kids take naps, or after DH gets home. DH and I decide what we're having for dinner together, because we never know what we're in the mood for until meal time rolls around. I keep a clean house, but cleaning isn't ever going to come before my children. Again, that doesn't just mean caring for them (diaper changes, feeding tehm, etc.). That means going for walks, playing in the yard, watching movies, giving them hugs and kisses, etc. Chores can wait.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 11:44 PM on Mar. 25, 2010

  • Just know this to will pass... They will know you were there for them every step of the way, and share a bond with you that no one can break.. Do take time to snuggle, play etc. But remember children are very resilient, they live in the moment and don't stress over life like we do. Make it a point to hug, kiss, and love on them off and on through the day, but don't punish yourself for not being on the floor playing with them everyday. Maybe set a time everyday, even if it's 30 minutes, to read to them. Or at that age just look at a book together.. It will feed yours and their need to be together outside of everyday chores, and they will grow to love books, and you will feel better.. Also don't forget about YOU! You need time to yourself, so make it a point to take care of you!!
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 12:36 AM on Mar. 26, 2010

  • I know what you mean. I have a 4 year old, a 10 month old and go to school online. If I get a lot of schoolwork done then nothing else gets done. Besides just the taking care of my kids, not even enjoying them, that is. I'm trying so hard just to hurry up and get school done but I feel like I'm missing out on so much with them and that they are missing out on time with me. I have no idea what to do about any of it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:57 AM on Mar. 26, 2010

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