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Why would he blame me?

So I am slowly finding out that my DH allows his kids to blame me for decisions he has made. It really hurts. Why would he allow this to happen? I try really hard to be good to my step kids. I have been wondering for sometime why they get funky attitudes with me for no reason. I approached my DH and he just sits there like it is no big deal. On occasions he will say "well you did not disagree with me" Or he will just say to get over it. He tells me I handle things better than him. I think that is wrong to let someone else take the heat. What would you do or say?

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:41 PM on Mar. 26, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • i would talk to the kids in his presents. that way everyone can be clear about how they feel.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:45 PM on Mar. 26, 2010

  • I have talked to everyone. My Dh was present. He just sat there and said nothing. The kids looked at me like an alien. I told the kids that their dad was the one making the decisions not me and to please ask before thinking I am cracking down on them. then my DH gets pissed I told them the truth. He says "Great, now they are mad at me!!! " and walked off.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:54 PM on Mar. 26, 2010

  • Sounds like your husband has some issues with maturity and integrity. He should be held accountable for his decisions, he's a grown man. Perhaps some family or couples counseling would do you all some good. It's hard enough for you to earn respect from his children based on the situation. He doesn't need to be painting an ugly picture of you for his kids to make himself look better. I don't believe that anywhere in your vows, you agreed to be his scapegoat. Also, before making decisions, you both should discuss the options and come to an agreement so that the kids will see that you're a team. Right now you're working against each other and that is not healthy for them at all. I hope this advice helps you and that your family can grow past this. Good luck.

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 8:09 PM on Mar. 26, 2010

  • laughingWhat a "great" guy you married! Blame it on the wife, she doesn't matter! lol


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Mar. 26, 2010

  • why dont you make decisions regarding them? turn yourself into the good guy? basically all the decisions that fuck up are blamed on you... so go make an actual decision- without consulting your DH- and let it be something for the kids and what they want, that DH might not like.

    Answer by Shy_Dia at 9:21 PM on Mar. 26, 2010

  • can you give a example?

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 9:37 PM on Mar. 26, 2010

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