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would this be considered cheating?

my husband as a female friend that he has nown since middle school and they both liked each other but never did anything about it. she is married with two lil girls of her own. even though her marriage is an abusive one and only based on sex. She texts my husband 24/7 and i have now clue what they are talking about cause he refuses to let me see his phone. he swears nothing is going on that he is loyal to me and his daughters til he starts poping off stupid remarks that he was forced to marry me. he never wanted to get married at all. when he is home from work he spends most of his time on the phone texting his female friend then he does with me our our family. I don't know if i have anything to really worry about besides her remarks .when she says that she won't think twice about commenting adaltry on her husband with mine.

 
WahyaLuna

Asked by WahyaLuna at 10:49 AM on Mar. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Level 2 (5 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • yup sounds dirty to me..Honestly if he was txting her about things friends should be txting about he'd have no problem letting you read their txts,And the whole 24/7 txting thing? NO he needs to gett off the phone and take care of his family,and she needs to get off her damn phone and get her and her 2 daughters out of that abusive relationship (if something is going on sounds like theyu deserve eachother) good luck!
    mommy16love

    Answer by mommy16love at 12:12 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • If he won't let you see the phone then he is up to no good! Wait till he is in the shower or asleep and go through his phone. I would not put up with this, that b8itch is disrespectful and I would put her in her place!

    kjfamily

    Answer by kjfamily at 10:52 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • Yeah sounds way too shady for me. I don't check my husband's phone but if I saw him constantly texting a woman he'd be out like trout!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • red flag
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:00 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • Yea, I would def tell him that it bothers you. See how he reacts, if he stops then I would say there is nothing to worry about. If he gets defensive and tells you that he won't stop then obviously talking to other women is more important then making you happy AND there is def something wrong wtih that!
    kaylan010

    Answer by kaylan010 at 11:08 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • if he wont let you see it then yes something is wrong... and if he is telling you that he was forced to marry you something is def wrong... i would tell him how it is and tell him its you or her and if he picks her divorce is likely in the future
    jaksonsmommy

    Answer by jaksonsmommy at 11:14 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • i agree with kaylan, tell him how it makes you feel and see what he does. also when he says he was forced into the marriage id show him where the door is and tell him hes free to leave at anytime. because i think thats just down right rude.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:15 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • Whether it's cheating or not is debatable, without knowing the contents of the texts. But whether it's cheating or not isn't really the issue. The issue is that what he is doing is making you uncomfortable, and what they both are doing (her telling him she'd cheat with him, him NOT telling her he wouldn't), is disrespecting you. You need to tell him, bluntly, that this needs to stop. If he refuses to stop, that to me, would be saying she's more important than you, and at that point, again cheating or not, I'd leave. If mine told me, whether thru actions or with the actual words, that a female friend was more important to him than I am, that would mean my relationship with him is over. I refuse to be less important than a friend. I should be his best friend, lover, everything. That's what you should expect from him. It doesn't sound like that's what he's giving you.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 11:28 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • In my marriage it would be cheating. What's up with the hiding-the-phone-conversations-crap??
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 11:58 AM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • I agree with the people. I am sure he wouldn't like it if you were talking with other men Best friend from school or not. If really need to know what was going on I would check his phone. That isn't right for him to be hiding stuff from you. If he saying he is forced into the marriage I would show him the door. You don't have to be disrespected by him, your better then that. Hopefully you find out.
    Claudiomom

    Answer by Claudiomom at 12:10 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

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