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How would you handle your 17 year old daughter in this situation?

She has been dating this guy for about 6 months. They are going to prom together. A few months ago she broke up with him because his dad kicked him out of the house and he had no where to go...So he went and stayed with is ex girlfriends and her parents. My daughter was upset. I thought it was strange and just was glad he was not dating my daughter anymore. Now he is back in the picture and I drop her off today and she tells me she needs me to come inside to meet someone. So I figure it is his sister or something. Guess what..????? HE HAS A CHILD!!!! I was speechless and I think it showed. Number one I was upset she did not share this information with me before hand and secondly this guy has no goals and has a kid. I know I am being judgemental but I want more for my daughter than her being caught up with a guy that wants her to be a step mom to his kid. I am wondering how to handle this. Then I find out that his sister CONT>>

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:29 PM on Mar. 27, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (19)
  • Make sure your DD is sexually protected and not only by a purity ring. i would allow them to go to Prom because it is really to late to make too many changes with that but don't allow her to be with him unsupervised EVER!!!
    Who is the baby mamma? Why did they not make it? Have you talked to her about that situation? Not about your thoughts and disapproval but her about her thoughts.
    Yeah the baby is cute but...make a plan so she does not end up the same way. Talk to her as an adult because this is an adult situation.
    And Good Luck!!!
    mom2priceboys

    Answer by mom2priceboys at 8:45 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • who is 18 has a kid too!!! I am beginning to think there is a lack of supervision in the house if both her kids are knocked up by 18. Should I allow her to keep seeing this guy but only at our house since I know there is supervision here. I don't want to make her so angry that I send her running into his arms. His family seems nice but they just don't have the same upbringing and morals as us. What should I do and how should this be handled?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:32 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • RUN!!!!!!!

    She is 16 she needs to focus on getting into college, being silly with friends, and being a kid. There is NO reason to jump into something that serious when she is so young.

    It might sound harsh but she needs to find a boy to date who is still a kid with kid issues... this is supposed to be a carefree time of life.. why bring un-needed drama to her life.

    Let her be a kid as long as she can.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • It takes two to tango, if your daughter has the morals you say you have taught her then you shouldnt be worried would you?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:38 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • dont be afraid of your kid... be strong.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:39 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • i respectfully disagree with anon :38.... even if she never has sex with him she is getting emotionally involved with a boy who is a father... too much drama too young. She should be focused on her youth, making choices for her future, college, etc.  She can think about babies and fathers when she is much older, done with school, more mature, and can THEN make better life choices. 


     


     

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:45 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • Play it cool, facing her head on with disaproval will back fire. Be subtle with your advice, but make her think what she might be getting into. Sometimes we learn from our own mistakes and there is usually no stopping young love, but there is a time when we need to let go in spite of our ideas of failure. Just make sure you lay out a scenario for her, and let her smarts decide.
    older

    Answer by older at 8:50 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • That was just mean spirited. I had two teens (one male and one female) have children as teens and I assure you they were supervised in the home. Teens find a way when it comes to sex.. Both of my children grew up to be responsible parents, btw. I would imagine he's having sex with your dd as well if he's used to having sex so focus on getting her birth control and not bashing this young man. Teens are for guiding, not throwing away bc they screw up.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:55 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • I dont think his flat out asking her to be his child's step mom. You also say it like its this horrible evil thing for him to have a child. If she wants to be part of his life that means being a part of his sons life. She wanted you to be a part of that too but if you are going to act the way you did then they are going to keep you out of everything thing they do. They way you were brought up has nothing to do with a teenagers sex life. They are going to have sex whether you like it or not but I guarantee you that she will be more considerate of your thoughts and feeling if you are of hers. You cant seriously blame the parents for those two kids having kids. No parents want their teens to have babies. I'm sure you cant supervise your daughter all the time either. Just spend more time with her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:00 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

  • Take her to get an IUD put in. No IUD, no seeing the boy.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 9:00 PM on Mar. 27, 2010

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