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has anyone ever tried couples counceling or marriage counceling?

I'm asking because I want to try this with my man because we fight so much but we do love each other and we have a baby together. Does it work?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:30 PM on Mar. 28, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (12)
  • We did and I think it helped quite a bit.
    kuriequinn

    Answer by kuriequinn at 12:31 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • My ex husband and I went to counseling to try and save our marriage. The sessions proved to me that I really did want out and we divorced a year later. I guess it can be helpful in clarifying things.
    Merjo

    Answer by Merjo at 12:33 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I tried that with my ex husband. He went to one session with me and quit. I continued therapy because I knew I had some issues to work on and only quit going because I was goig through some complications with my pregnancy at the time. It all depends on if you both are willing to go and try. If only one party is willing to make the effort there's no point in trying. But I like therapy. I go every couple of years to learn how to manage stress better when I can't fugre it out myself and having someone who is neutral helps me put things into perspective.
    NikLvsNick

    Answer by NikLvsNick at 1:10 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • its not really the counselling that "works"

    its how you as a couple USE it

    we did counselling for a while when dh's dad was dying, and it helped us. but we were willing to use what the counsellor said, and the exercises. it was a lot of work and effort but for us it paid off.
    hypermamaz

    Answer by hypermamaz at 1:11 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • it works for some. i thinkt he key is finding someone who will work with you and not try to enforce a particular standard of marriage. Really you and your husband need to figure out how to communicate about you issues and learn to negotiate. You also need to se out your expectations for marriage in a way that is fair and understandable by each of you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:12 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • It helped my husband and I. But we were both willing to work on it, and to GO and that's the big thing. Both people have to be willing. That and our problems had a lot to do with my husband's PTSD so we both learned how to cope and help each other through it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:18 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • we tried it and it made it worse. My husbadn cheated on me and we went and the counselor blammed all of our problems on me saying it was my fault i got pregnant so fast it was my fault my husbadn didnt want to touch me after i found out i was pregnant and it was my fault he cheated on me when i 7 months pregnant and then said i'll be the reason for a broken marriage and depressed kids because they dont have their daddy anymore. I found out he cheated on me and then two weeks later we went to counseling and the guy wanted me to get over then and now and forgive him right away. He also excused my husbadns behavor because of his past, i had a worse childhood then my husband but its was still my fault aparently. We have been back since adn i'm about to get a divorce now so a lot of good the counseling did for us
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:29 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • My ex- and I went. I felt "safe" there and said a bunch of stuff that was bugging me. He took it all wrong and packed up and left. So, even though you are "supposed to" talk, watch what you say and how you say it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:52 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • My ex and I went. I guess it helps for some people. The therapist actually is the one who made me truly analyze my marriage and make the decision to leave.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 2:08 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I tried it with the first husband.....While in Therapy he turned and twisted everything to the point he had the therapist on his side and they were ganging up on me! So It didn't work out for us and did end up leaving anyway.
    Alot of moms on here had alot of good things to say, If anything it will bring clarity to your marriage to see if you really want to stay together.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:18 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

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