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Divorce rate?

Why do you think the divorce rate is so high in the US? I read an article by Stephanie Coontz about how one of the main reasons for divorce is because we now marry for "love", meaning romantic love when it used to be about financial gain for the parties involved. She talks about how we set unrealistic standards for marriage based on the feelings of romantic love that we get from our significant other in the first couple years of marriage, and expect that to last FOREVER when biologically it doesn't. She says this causes disappointment and leads to unhappiness and ultimately leads to a higher divorce rate.

Do you agree, disagree, agree with some aspects or none of the above? :)

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Mar. 28, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • I think alot of people forget that your marriage is going to go through ups and downs. Yes people used to marry so they can prosper but that they also felt a deep sense of commitment and love for each other.
    Now days people jump into marriage forgetting it takes work on both sides. Now days people have to much self focus, a marriage cannot survive when one is self focused, you need to focus on each other, learn from each other's wisdom and make changes within your self.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:39 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • i think one person in the marriage stops trying and that's why it fails
    TaiM

    Answer by TaiM at 4:43 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • People are lazy. They don't realize that marriage is work, HARD WORK. They don' t realize that people's feelings are going to get hurt, that they are going to disagree on some issues and that their spouse is human and therefore will make mistakes.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:44 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I realize marriage is hard work and raising a family is hard work that is why I did not get married when I had both of my sons. They have unrealistic thoughts or they keep trying to change the person or they get married and they do not realize how really hard it is.

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 5:05 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • The truth is people get together because of attraction. Then when they realize attraction is not enough they split. Marriage is a vow to work through everything and to be partners in this life. So many refuse to give it their all, because there was no love in the relationship in the beginning. Yahweh bless
    Daphna28

    Answer by Daphna28 at 5:12 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I agree with all of the above. Romantic love is "advertised" all over our society, through tv, movies, media, etc. It is easy to grow up with this notion. I think without romantic love people would not be getting married at the rate they do so they would be getting divorced at a much lower rate as well. Needless to say romantic love is nice but marriage is much more than that. It'd be nice to see the hard work and commitment nessecary for a long marriage shown or taught to our children as well.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 5:45 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • Because how the divorce rate is calculated is messed up. Plus too many jump into it.
    purpleducky

    Answer by purpleducky at 7:49 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I don't think any of us here can assume anything on someone else's marriage, period. I think there are many reasons people get divorced and it doesn't mean they didn't try, or they didn't seek help, etc. People do what they feel is right for them at the time they make their decision, and that's that.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 8:40 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I agree with rio burb. There is no one reason people get divorced, everyone is different and everyone relationship is different.
    MeandMyBabes

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 10:01 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • idk... my mom has married and divorced a lot of ppl... til she found the right one.... my husband has 2 friends that recently went thro divorces because both wives cheated on them, i love my husband and he loves me, we did marry young and most marriages where you get married at 17 never last but i have a feeling this one will :)
    bmdred

    Answer by bmdred at 10:35 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

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