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help please!!!!!

Fixen' to be a new mom and I already have a rambukshish 2 year old. When I had my son, I had my mother in law, at the time to help me get the baby on schedual for the first two weeks. She cooked, cleaned, helped breast feed..... the whole nine yards! Now bringing my second son in to the world....I dont have any help after I get out of the hospital...... absoulutly NONE. I'm very very scared. It was so hard for me to even stand after I brought my first one home. The baby will be sleeping in my room for the first 6 months. I have to get up every 2 hours to feed, my man has to get up at 6 and my 2 year old has had sleeping problems since he was born. By morning all i'm gonna want to do is sleep. I'm going to be aggrivated and stressed. I know most of you will tell me i'll be fine, but I already suffer from deppression and anxiety. How am I gonna do this. PLEASE HELP. I've been crying for weeks ove this. please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!

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a.mitchell09

Asked by a.mitchell09 at 9:07 PM on Mar. 28, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Many times we make situations worst than they are because of our anxiety. I'm not trying to tell you to brush off how you feel. But many time we cannot see the forest because of the trees. In other words is there no one at all who can help you? A friend, a neighbor?, a cousin?. Perhaps they may not be able to do what your mother did but they can help out some.
    my2kids312

    Answer by my2kids312 at 9:13 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • Is there anyway you can find a post partum doula - someone who could do the same things your MIL did for you the first time around? If not, maybe someone from church or a nice neighbor could play with the toddler for a while or help my bringing over dinner occasionally. If you have freezer space, start cooking and freezing meals now for yourself. FOr moral support, find a La Leche League group in your area and go to a meeting to meet other moms and get ideas for hope to deal with everything. Some of my best mommy friends are women I met through LLL, and we have a support network for new moms where we bring over food and help with laundry & such when they need a hand. I'm sure you will find someone to help out, don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Good luck to you!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • I stayed depressed for years and had 3 children. My dh would move out every time I started showing. I even had surgery during my last pregnancy and had to be awake during it. No one helped me. You just do what you have to do. You will figure it all out. The rest of us did. You do need to stop crying (not bashing) bc you are stressing the baby.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:23 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • well, having two is hard work. Our kids were 20 months apart and we co-slept, so we did have both kids in bed with us and that helped me get more sleep at night. My husband helped out too :) We had some help during the day, but my husband had a few weeks off work to help. My suggestion is that if your husband can't get the time off to consider highering a post partum doula during that day. They can help you with all of that stuff, including breastfeeding.
    Precious333

    Answer by Precious333 at 9:30 PM on Mar. 28, 2010

  • Y cant your MIL help this time around?
    pinkcicle709

    Answer by pinkcicle709 at 12:20 AM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • I think that you are stressing about things that may not be. This baby may be a good sleeper. You may not have to get up every 2 hours to fee. My last baby went 4 hours from the beginning. I am not one to let the tv be a babysitter but I do use it right after having a baby. My dh does not take any time off of work. When I had baby #3 my boys (then 20 months and 33 months) would watch a little tv if I was tired and took a break on the couch. It was my life saver. Remember to just take one day at time. All you have to do is make sure the kids are clothed, fed and diapers changed. Everything else will fall in line later.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:54 AM on Mar. 29, 2010

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