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idea of sex making me ill-

I've always had a high sex drive. now the idea of sex with my husband is making me ill. I'm starting here- he's got chest hair which I know is normal and all. I've never liked it on any man. I've never been a woman who tried to change a man, but physically it was the only thing about him I found unattractive. I figured why throw away a someone for such a small thing?
I've asked him to shave it, and he's willing to trim down close, but I've always found sleek chests very appealing. Think I'd probably feel better about it if he trimmed it down, but to really rev my engine I need a hair free chest.
I've gone brazillian for hin from time to time because he loves it. but this for me? forget it.
Long story short, he's a great guy otherwise, and does all kinds of things for me.
but not sure how to get past this. I've tried to look past it, imagine someone else- I'd call be crazy for this 'little thing'. but it's true and cont


Asked by Anonymous at 8:21 PM on Mar. 29, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • Women run marathons around men when it comes to making themselves more attractive to the opposite sex why not ask for a little in return?

    Answer by Christina2135 at 8:35 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • I'm not sure what to do. I could try to tell him again how much it bothers me, but he gets on his high horse acting like there's something wrong with wanting him to do so. Like I should find it sexy on principal or something-

    but it really is turning me off to the point where I don't want sex with him-

    I'd love it if there was no bashing, but since I know there will be, knock yourself out I suppose-
    but I hope that someone who posts can offer usable advice -

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:24 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • hun theres better things to worry about in a realtionship,i think your being a bit selfish.Think about it theres women here who get beat and cheated on and your complainning about chest hair?My best advice to is to not think so much about what you want.What if he told you he secretly thinks you smell like rotten eggs no matter what you do while you are on your period.If his chest hair is that critical than get with someone else and let him find another woman to treat well that does not worry about un important things.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:31 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • Naire it while he's sleeping.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:32 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • I do not know you but I got to tell you that maybe there is an underlying reason other than the hair that is turning you off. In the scheme of things chest hair shouldn't be a deterrant for love making unless of course the man is part bear and it is outrageously bushy. You are upset because he won't bend and meet you half way like you have done. How long have you been with him? have you always felt like this? or is this a recent thing?
    If you analyze it and this man is in every other way what you want, maybe you can use some honey instead of forcing him to do this, therr are many subtle ways to get a man to do what you want, but most of them when faced with demands back off.

    Answer by older at 8:35 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • OP- anon 831- I know that, if I didn't I wouldn't have been around for 12 years- just think I've reached my limit, and people feel how they feel. You can't tell yourself, well, this feeling is selfish and minor, so magically make yourself feel differently!
    sorry, but as happy as I am that he treats me well and doesn't beat me, lying in bed thinking "I'm not getting beaten, I'm not getting beaten" really does not start my motor running. There's a difference between knowing that you have a good life, and getting sexually turned on-

    as for anon 832- LMAO! at least I'm getting a laugh out of picturing that! I am a sleep walker, hmmm... maybe that would work! Just kidding!!!! :)

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • You should buy a bunch of "shaving fetish" porn and watch it before sex sessions with him. He'll probably see the difference in your love making when you're turned on and maybe he'll want to be the one that does it for you.

    Answer by Christina2135 at 8:40 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • OP-thanks christina2135- I just might do that! my DH is usually very open and very logical about things- thought he'd be open to it every once in a while since he knows how much he likes a brazillian every so often- nope. I know it's his body, but "I feel how I feel"- ironically that is HIS line!

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:44 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • I don't like hair on a man chest ether my hubby has some. I told him to shave it to get rid of it after a wile he did. I told him to try it because I think a man looks sexy w/a smooth chest. He already had the six pack going. So he did it one day he just shaved it off I was super happy. But then he said to me that he didn't like it he didn't feel right. He told me that he's chest look like a little boy & not like a real mans chest.Lol After that i never asked him to do it again. It doesn't boder me now because he tried. So just ask him let him know. He maight just try it.

    Answer by Bless2haveU at 9:50 PM on Mar. 29, 2010

  • I would offer him a trade- you will do a Brazilian if he will shave his chest.

    Fair is fair. Why should you be the only one making the effort to look sexy to the other person??

    Answer by emslala at 12:28 AM on Mar. 30, 2010