Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do you find the inner you?

I have been so lost and confused lately, I don't know what to do about it. I have 4 wonderful amazing kids that deserve 100 percent outta me and it feels like i am failing to do that. I feel like I am failing as a wife, mom and a person. Life has been rough the past 4, 5 years and i feel like its really been wearing me down. I want to be me again. I want to be the mom that I was 4, 5 years ago. But I am so lost and so not myself anymore I don't know how to get there. I am not religious really so i'm not looking for advice about god, or anything like that. I am in dire need of some good friendly advice... how do i become me again? I do I find myself again?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:34 AM on Mar. 30, 2010 in Health

Answers (4)
  • you take time for yourself. don't push yourself with a timeline--make an effort to take small steps to get back to a version of what you admired in yourself before. And when you falter, forgive yourself. We are human and we all lose our way. Life is tricky. Being a parent and the girl you always thought you were is also tough at times and challenged by so many things life throws at us. Also, meditate and exercise and you'll get there.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 1:58 AM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • You may be experiencing depression. If you're like me and are not one to want to get all medicated, try other things that help you feel good about yourself. Like exercising. Do a couple sets of sit-ups or go for a jog or a brisk walk. Get outside more, stop to appreciate the little simple things in life. Start journaling or blogging. Make sure to make time for putting on your make-up everyday. Sounds superficial, but can do wonders to boost your self-esteem. Take up a hobby, something that you enjoy doing a great deal. Just make time for yourself! I hope I was of some help. :)

    Answer by TattooedMommy04 at 1:58 AM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • What you're experiencing is depression. There are several things that you could do to try & get through it, but what works for one person wont always work for another. My main advice would be to seek counseling, where they can get to know you & you can both put together a "healing plan" that fits you & your lifestyle. A few other suggestions would be to try to find the positive in the things around you (easier said than done, but the more you do it the easier it gets), take time for you & only you to do something that you don't usually get to do but that you really like, start a journal to get all your thoughts down on paper (sometimes writing it all down & reading it over will help you orginize your thoughts & show you where you're struggling most), or if you want more ideas just message me. Also, try not to beat yourself up about it all...depression is not your fault, it is a chemical malfunction & can be treated...

    Answer by WannabeMommy87 at 2:32 AM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • PS - when I say treated, I don't mean just medically (which meds are an option, but not the only option). There are also plenty of natural things that can be done to help. Like I said, try finding a therapist or counseling of some sort to discuss one on one with someone what the best plan should be for you personally. I hope you feel better soon, I totally know where you're coming from & how it feels to feel so out of place...

    Answer by WannabeMommy87 at 2:37 AM on Mar. 30, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.