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How long is too long?

I have been with my bf for 10 months, he said that he wanted to take things very slow due to being hurt in the past. ok I can understand that BUT do u think that by now he should be saying he loves me? Hes told me that he doesnt love me, thats not to say that he doesnt CARE for me but he says he takes the word LOVE very serious and hes not just going to say it to say it. do u guys think that after 10 months he should be saying he loves me or is there something wrong?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:29 PM on Mar. 30, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • It took my husband 10 months to first say he loved me. He had been deeply hurt by his ex when she betrayed their marriage, had an affair and left him for that man. It took him 9 months to refer to me as his girlfriend. But then he proposed to me around 2 years after we began dating. I never pressured him for any of it and was very patient. I knew I was dealing with someone who had been wounded and would take time to heal. I wanted him to feel safe with me and in time he did come around. We've been married 5 months now and together for over 3 years. We have a wonderful relationship.
    kathyartist2007

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 4:48 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • He will say it when he is ready. There certainly is no set time by which one must profess love - you can date a person for years without falling in love. If you need to hear those three little words, maybe you should find someone who does not have the emotional baggage that he has. If you truly love him, however, you can wait and be faithful only to him.
    neebug3766

    Answer by neebug3766 at 2:31 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • I don't think there is a timetable for that. Perhaps due to past relationships he's confused about what love means. He doesn't want to make any promises he has no intention of keeping, or perhaps he doesn't love you, all of these or none of these could be true. You get to decide what you want in a relationship and if this isn't it....it's better to walk away now than to hang on for years waiting for something that may never happen.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:32 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • no. he will say it when he really means it and it will be very special. dont pressure him into having more of a relationship than he wants or it will just drive him away.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • i thought this was a penis question :(
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 2:40 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • Read 'He's Just Not That Into You.'

    Men jump at the chance to marry women they can't stand to be without. Sounds like this charmer is waiting to see if something better comes along.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:44 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • Lmoa staciandababy! Lol op no time limit for love! I waited so long to say it my hubby tricked me into it. He asked me what love was to me and then asked me if I felt that way about him. I said yes and then he said then you love me! He was right
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 2:47 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • i thought this was a penis question :(

    OH LOLOL....that was too funny.
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 3:50 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • HA staciandbaby said penis LOLOL
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 3:51 PM on Mar. 30, 2010

  • to quote a certain TV show writer..............
    "sounds like he's just not that into you"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:57 PM on Mar. 30, 2010