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Dating world

My friend has a hard time with dating. So a guy she is talking to online/over the phone but hasn't met yet called her at 8:30 on a friday night and asked her to go to dinner. I told her she should say no! But she thinks this is okay. I think it sends the wrong message to him. What do you think?

Answer Question
 
bjane01

Asked by bjane01 at 8:32 AM on Mar. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,452 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I thikn you are right.
    mommymeg03

    Answer by mommymeg03 at 8:43 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • I have a friend that is in the same situation - Apparently that is what the "kids" do these days. They do not actually talk, they text and when making plans it is perfectly acceptable to ask right then to do something and not plan in advance. It is just the way it is now.... GOSH I am old!

    I was shocked and would have told my friend the same thing !
    chefronswife

    Answer by chefronswife at 8:48 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • My husband and I met online nine years ago and have now been happily married for five years (tomorrow). Your friend should say yes, but only if they meet in a public place (just to be on the safe side). There are some nuts out there, as we all know, so it is always better to be safe than sorry. I wish your friend luck.
    Merjo

    Answer by Merjo at 8:48 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • Honestly, I'm kind of torn on this one. I was talking to one guy online, who always called me last minute to get together. Aside from the obvious complications with kids, it just drove me nuts that he just expected me to be available like that. On the other hand, my boyfriend and I had to make plans kind of last minute and spur of the moment when we were first getting together and meeting, b/c as a truck driver, he was only home a few short days and honestly didn't know when he would be home, so his last minute calls weren't out of rudeness or any expectation that I MUST be free, but that he was home, he knew he'd have to leave soon, and let's get together while we can. Maybe this guy is like that. Maybe he has a schedule that is just so busy that this is the only way he can get together with her. Who knows?
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 8:57 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • No, I agree.

    Last minute invite, she should not be so available. Make him sweat...

    It is not nice, if you ask me. She should act like she has plans, and he should set it up earlier.
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 9:18 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • Why play games about "last minute invites"? So silly.... It's good that she went. Obviously she wasn't busy.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 9:43 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • She didn't end up going anyway because she was busy. But I think it was inappropriate given that she has never met him before. Also she tends to give too much too soon and guys always run away from her because of this. It freaks them out. I was thinking she needed to make him work to be with her and not give so much. I hate to say it but she comes off seeming desperate too often and I am trying to help her.I was glad she didn't go and they now have a date on friday night.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 11:27 AM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • There are a lucky few who find the right one right away. The rest of us suffer with dating. It isn't easy and if you want to play by what someone thinks are the rules you are only going to make it tougher on yourself. Go if you can, don't if you can't. Be yourself. Quit worrying about sounding desperate because you are only going to end up with someone who won't listen to your problems if you truly are the type to talk about everything. It's dumb to change hoping to snag someone. You will get what you don't want. It's better to be alone than with the wrong person.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:13 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • To me, it's not the online thing...have done that and no problems with it. But to be so available so last minute...maybe she could have said tomorrow or something.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:23 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • I would have gone, unless I had plans. I like being spontaneous.
    MeandMyBabes

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 2:13 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

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