Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

10 month old throwing fits

I have a 4 year old daughter that never did this. My 10 month old son hits his hands on things when he is angry. He pushs the bottle away very hard. He looks at you and screams if you put him down. My DD never did this so we have no idea what to do. How can we nip this in the bud? Is there a way to stop this quickly? I can see him getting really bad as he gets older. So any motherly advice would be great!

Answer Question
 
theatregirl26

Asked by theatregirl26 at 1:09 PM on Mar. 31, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 3 (14 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • He might be feeling lack of control of certain situations especially if he sees his older sister doing so much. He's communicating with you the only way he knows how and letting you know that he is frustrated.
    KendraR

    Answer by KendraR at 1:22 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • I have a 16 month old and he does the same thing... he acually had a 30 min. melt down the other day. I try to do what everyone say's, just ignore them, but stay close by and give them love & support so they feel safe. My little guy wont let me put him down or sit myself down while i hold him.... I have a 6 year old who never acted this way....I keep saying this too will pass. Good luck
    Blu-Dash

    Answer by Blu-Dash at 1:35 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • If he screams when you put him down every time you put him down it is likely separation anxiety.. Give him lots of love, attention, don't yell at him, etc. The more you push your baby away the more he will fight for your attention and the more fearful he will become. Or, he'll give up on you meeting his needs (form an attachment disorder).

    You don't "nip it in the bud". If he throws stuff/bangs stuff.. just ignore it/remove it calmly. If he does something the nice way, praise it. Also make sure you are giving enough attention in general. Ignored babies sometimes do angry things because bad attention is better than no attention. Or they just want to try out different emotions and you are supposed to be a safe, constructive person to try them out with. If you react in anger, he'll think anger is appropriate a lot more than is necessarily so.

    He's a baby. You model behavior, encourage good, and ignore bad.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • well, not ignoring all bad. ignore/remove/distract.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:44 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • I agree that this is not something you can "nip in the bud". ignore/remove/distract is AWESOME advice, and it may become your mantra for the next 6-12 months :-)
    The best thing you can do is to simply not "give in" to the tantrum if he is trying to get what he wants. Ignore the tantrum, give extra attention when he is behaving the way you want him to. Remove him or the object if he is hitting, grabbing, throwing etc.
    maggiemom2000

    Answer by maggiemom2000 at 3:48 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • That's what I mean by nipping it in the bud. I mean changing it now instead of 2 years from now. Thank you ladies for the advise. If it is some frustration (which does fit him some), how do you fix that for him. He watches kids play and moves so like he wants to go but he can't yet.

    How do I sit and let him cry? I agree that is great idea and I do try, but he just doesn't stop. Not sure how to help with this.
    theatregirl26

    Answer by theatregirl26 at 4:29 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

  • If he is really upset, as opposed to trying to "get his way" then by all means hold him and comfort him. For some kids leaving them alone is the best way for them to get back in control. For some kids, it really helps them to calm down if they are held, even hugged tight. This is not rewarding behavior or "Giving in" to comfort your child or to be with him to help him calm down. This helps to model and guide him so that he can learn to do it on his own.

    There is a great saying about how a child can't learn to "get in control" without getting out of control. you can help guide him in getting it back together.

    You can talk to him and help him put words to what he is feeling like "I'll bet you are really frustrated right now! You want to run with the big kids" When he starts talking he will have heard this and be better able to tell you he is frustrated or mad or whatever.
    maggiemom2000

    Answer by maggiemom2000 at 5:14 PM on Mar. 31, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN