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Would you stay married if the only reason was for your children?

I have many reasons for wanting a divorce but I keep coming back to "can I do this to my kids?" I have no family here and so I'd be taking the kids 300+ miles from their dad and his family and I know his parents will get involved and things will get messy. But do I stay "just for the kids?"

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Asked by mommyofone123 at 9:20 PM on Apr. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Level 2 (9 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • NO! It's much better for the kids if they are not brought up in a home with a loveless marriage. There is more stability having two happy and healthy parents in separate homes than there is to have to miserable and unhappy parents in one.

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 9:22 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • I believe in the long run it will hurt them worse to see there parents fight. . . . eventualy you wont be able to do it anymore anyways. Try to split peacefully now.

    Answer by TamlynM2B at 9:22 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • Yes, we went through many hard times and I think I mainly stayed because I didn't think I could do it alone. But now years later we have gotten used to the things we can not change about each other and we are very happy.

    Answer by BlooBird at 9:23 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • No because children do not thrive in a home where parents don't love each other. Parents don't seem to realize this in these homes but if you talk to grown children of these parents they will tell you they wished their parents had divorced.

    Answer by MamaChamp at 9:23 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • It depends on the situation. If I was cheated on a lot and/or abused. I'd leave and take my kids with me.

    Answer by MLM0503 at 9:24 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • No, I think in the end it is worse on a kid when parents stay together just for them....

    Answer by anetrnlov at 9:27 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • I dont agree with the majority of you.

    I think each case is different. How much longer until they are off in college? What is the reason for leaving? There are way too many vairables for US to decide.

    Example of a situation where it would be better to saty.....If it is a matter of keeping the status quo for a couple more years... if your youngest is in h.s. and if the only reason is that you fell out of love... but you are still friends. WHY in hell would you screw over the kid.. you cant put aside your wants for a few years for the sake of the child??? Speically if like you said you would move 300 miles.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:15 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • hmm i think it depends on why u wanna leave. personally i think i would put my wants aside and stay so my kids can grow up with mommy and daddy. but if dh was a habitual cheater/ abusive i would leave. i just think its a shame that more and more kids are growing up in broken homes mainly b/c one of the parents wanna be selfish and think of "me"(not saying this is u op im just typing my thoughts as they come in my head).

    Answer by 3xangel at 10:55 PM on Apr. 1, 2010

  • My dad stayed for me when he should've left. And I left my ex for my son. Do what you need to do. But overall if you're miserable, you kids will see that. Even if you don't outright show it will begin to seep into your life somehow.

    Answer by SinaiJ at 7:03 AM on Apr. 2, 2010

  • You shouldn't stay in a ba marriage for the sake of your kids, it is not healthy to bring them up in a bad marriage, t does them more harm than good. If mom is unhappy so will your kids.

    Answer by older at 7:32 AM on Apr. 2, 2010

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