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my husband is in prison for 7 years not to sure how to keep my childrens relationship with him a possitive one

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Asked by myworldof4 at 1:01 AM on Apr. 3, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (6)
  • just try to keep it as regular as possible. write letters every week. visit every month (or every other month or whatever). send pictures, art projects, etc. ...

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:03 AM on Apr. 3, 2010

  • Umm keep them involve with the father. like outsatndinglove said letters.... however be aware that they are older and in school and every else they are told that bad people go to jail. so it might be a challenge.... but good luck....

    Answer by iliana90 at 1:09 AM on Apr. 3, 2010

  • My children didn't think much about dad when he was gone. He sent them letters and called. They sent him cards but at this age they just played with their friends and went to school without much thought of dad. The problem with keeping them close and listening to some men in prison is the "jail house talk" promises men make to kids like how much they will spend time with them when they get out and how much they think about them and love them....blah blah blah. Sorry if that sounds negative but in my experience men in prison just hurt children when they try to stay close and feed them bs just to make them (the men) feel better and not so alone. If I had it to do over again I wouldn't even have mentioned their dad to them while he was gone. I' d have just let him deal with them in person when he got out. Good luck with this though. BTW, mine let the kids down when he got out. He just went on with his selfish life.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:11 AM on Apr. 3, 2010

  • The biggest thing that you can do is to never speak bad about their father. Keep the lines of communication open and don't push the children if they don't want to communicate with him.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 1:11 PM on Apr. 3, 2010

  • You could say this - None of us are perfect. We all make mistakes, and sometimes, we make bad choices. Sometimes those choices mean we have to go to jail, and sometimes we have to go for a very long time.

    Unfortunately, Daddy did this. That doesn't mean that he doesn't love you. It just means that he made some bad choices. That doesn't mean that we have to stop loving him. But it does mean that he has to go away. It's ok if you miss him, and it's ok for you to be angry at him, but it's also ok to still love him - you can even still love him while you're sad and mad! Daddy and I both understand this, and we both love you very much. You can write letters, visit, talk on the phone, send him care packages, etc (suggest to them whatever it is that you can do). But, if you don't feel like it, that's ok, too. You don't have to do these things. No matter what you decide, nothing is going to stop us from loving you.


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:55 AM on Apr. 5, 2010

  • I second what sailorwifenmom said.

    Answer by aly38914290 at 5:16 PM on Apr. 5, 2010

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