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If someone believes something you're doing is wrong, even if they don't say anything to you, does that automatically mean they're judging you?

I believe in certain standards, but I don't go around telling people what they should be doing because I have enough of my own flaws to work out. Is it fair, if someone pushes me to tell them what I believe, so I do, then they get offended?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:44 AM on Apr. 4, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Unless you are treating the friend differently because of the choices he/she has made, then you are not judging him/her. If the friend says you are judging him/her only because you have a difference of opinion on matters, then I'd say your friend is either looking for a fight or feeling insecure and/or guilty about his/her own choices. I wouldn't push the issue, but I would ask in what way have you treated him/her differently than others that would indicate that you were judging him/her, then leave him/her to think about it for a while.
    mom2aspclboy

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 9:47 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • it's not fair that they get offended. And i don't think that you believing that they are doing something wrong is judging. It's how you treat them and "label" them because of it.

    like teen moms for example. thinking that premarital sex is wrong is your opinion, but labeling all teen moms as bad parents is judging.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:52 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • judging to me is when you treat others like crap,not when you tell them that you don't agree.
    BUSYLOVINGHIM

    Answer by BUSYLOVINGHIM at 2:24 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Share if people ask, and let them take responsibility for their own feelings about it. It's fair for people to feel any way they do about any issue. 'Feelings" are never wrong, they just are.
    Lexylex

    Answer by Lexylex at 2:26 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Lexylex, You're right... I probably should have worded it differently. What if you're friendly and respectful, but the person pushes you to tell what you believe, then tells you not to judge them?

    OP
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • You are judging if you determine they are lower then you and you are better then them because of the opinion you reach. You may disagree with one mother because she gives her young child too much candy. but if you accept that some people may and some people wont its not really judging, you are just making comparisons
    Laura_Cruz

    Answer by Laura_Cruz at 3:33 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • So this is how I look at it, if they ask if you for your opinion, you give it to them, but don't say they are wrong. For example, "What do you think of cell phones?" "You say oh I don't like them." That's not judging.... but if you say "I don't like them and you are lazy and going to hell for liking them, " well then that is judging. KWIM? Just be polite and say what you think but don't comdemn the person for their choices. If they ask for you opinion, though, and you give it to them respectfully and nicely without putting them down then they should be ready to hear it and if they don't like your opinion then they should just accept it and agree to disagree and move on.
    TrystansMom314

    Answer by TrystansMom314 at 6:28 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Ok this is my take here. There is a difference between Constructive criticism and Judging.
    Constructive criticism is where you see some one doing some thing and give them advice to do it better, not necessarily saying YOU ARE WRONG. More saying you could possibly get better results here.
    Judging is more just saying they are wrong in some thing you could not possibly know for sure or prove ex. religion. Or just because they don't do things the same way as you. What you may do may not work for me, what I do may not work for you.
    To answer your other question I believe making a judgement on some one and not saying it is more of a personal judgement not necessarily wrong almost every one does it. I personally speak my mind and try not to judge either way though some times I do. How ever I always speak my mind, and attempt to do so and do in the beginning. When insulted I defend my self though. No body is perfect
    hot-mama86

    Answer by hot-mama86 at 11:13 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • I correct them in a loving way and show them that they were either doing something out of love, or make gentle suggestions and give them an example of a better way to go about it. Yahweh bless

    Daphna28

    Answer by Daphna28 at 11:17 AM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Well, DUH!! Judging is judging wheather you choose to call it "loving correction" or not. And certainly, if they ask for your opinion, they shouldn't be torked off because you oblige them and give it.
    witchqueen

    Answer by witchqueen at 12:32 PM on Apr. 4, 2010