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SAHMs do you go on playdates with SAHDs?

I only ask because I was on facebook yesterday and a guy from high school started talking to me. He still lives in the area, is a sahd to his 2 little girls. He mentioned about getting together sometime. I am hesitant because the first thing he said to me, after saying hi, was "you look really good" and I just find that odd that he would tell me that. I know that my dh would not tell another girl that, just randomly. And then he said about getting together. I mentioned a park that we go to but I felt really awkward about the whole situation so I told him the baby was crying and I had to go. Anyway, it just didn't feel right. Any thoughts?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:34 PM on Apr. 4, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • I think your reading into it a weee bit much...He said you look good not lets bang at the park lol
    ryanlynn

    Answer by ryanlynn at 2:45 PM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Sounds pretty innocent to me if he wants to meet you at the park. I say go. Haven't you ever felt lonely as a SAHM? I did. And there aren't that many SAHDs out there, so he's probably looking for another adult that he feels comfortable around to socialize with. And I think the "you look really good" was friendly. If he'd said, "wow, you're hot", then I'd think his priorities were somewhere else.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:45 PM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Ditto reading to much in to it. My best friend from high school saw me recently and he said wow Tia you look great! It doesnt mean anything. Dont take a compliment as hey I wanna do you. Geeze.
    Mrs.Owen86

    Answer by Mrs.Owen86 at 3:10 PM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • I had a conversation with an old guy friend from high school yesterday,on Facebook and he mentioned how we almost had sex one time!!! LOL!!! That was weird. Thankfully, we didn't and we were able to preserve our friendship. I was glad we caught up with each other and that we're both happily married now with kids.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:36 PM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • Probably didnt mean you look good as in sexy but just healthy and things someone would say after not seeing someone for a long while.

    If you didnt feel comfy then dont continue to talk to him. Or do a meetup at a park you dont go to often and see what happens. If he is wierd or whatnot then dont do another one.

    If it were me, Id meet up with him and see what happens. If it was a group of sahm's and there was a sahd or two I wouldnt worry about it either.
    Amaranth361

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 6:34 PM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • I can see how what he said could be taken a little oddly, but, sort of in his defense, there's friends that I haven't seen in yrs that I've said the same thing, or that they've said the same thing - wow - you look really good - I can't believe how much your kids have grown, that sort of thing.

    I have gotten together for play dates when my kids were little with SAHD's. BUT - I do think that this is something that you have to be careful with, and that you, your dh, and the other couple - all 4 of you - have to be aware of and ok with. He needs to meet your dh, you need to meet the wife, etc. It's best to keep it all up front, open, and honest.

    I would go, but maybe take another friend. If it's truly a play date, and not an attempt to start something, then he shouldn't mind.
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:09 PM on Apr. 4, 2010

  • I haven't set up a playdate specifically with a SAHD, because there are so few of them, and I think that they feel threatened or will be called a creep if they join playgroups.

    I have gone to the park on a few occasions with my children and SAHDs have been there. I have to say that at least 50 percent of the time friendly turns into flirtation and I walk away.

    I would invite him for a playdate either in a very public setting, or with a couple other moms and see what he says.
    twin_mommy

    Answer by twin_mommy at 11:25 AM on Oct. 22, 2010

  • I agree that "you look really good" is a bit off putting. I have had exes that I can't be friends with say that to me, but it always seems to be in an effort to "hook up".

    My girlfriends don't say that to me, for one because it isn't true(I have packed on quite a few pounds), and two it is weird and superficial.
    twin_mommy

    Answer by twin_mommy at 11:29 AM on Oct. 22, 2010

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