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My son

I need help. I had a new baby 3 weeks ago my oldest son who is almost 4 is acting up real bad. What can I do 2 make him feel better and special

Answer Question

Asked by kadmomma at 4:34 AM on Apr. 8, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 5 (101 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Make sure he feels involved it's his new baby too :) My oldest would sit next to me while i fed the baby and once the baby was down for a nap i would sit with my oldest and cuddle. I made a point of involving my kids each time a new baby was on the way and I let them help with the baby. Its hard anytime a new baby comes into the house, just make time for your oldest and tell him how much you love him. Many times I would tell them things like "when you were this age you did this......" Kids love to hear stories about themselves you can also point out the similarities between the two children things like " baby has the same nose you do" We did alot of that with our kids and now the 3 of them are very close, my oldest still treats them like they are his babies lol and is very protective, tolerant, and enforces the rules.

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 4:48 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • While including him in care for the baby as the previous poster stated, take one day out of the week where it is his special day. Leave baby with dad and take him to the zoo or park or something. It's going to be an adjustment for everyone, but things will get better.

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 9:49 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • I agree, let him help. He can get diapers or help you carry things. My son likes to help give the baby a bath (hold the soap or washcloth for me). Make sure he feels involved. I also get out the photo albums and let my son see pics of when he was a small baby. He loves that and we can do that together while I'm feeding the baby or durring naps.

    Answer by Jjoneslagrange at 12:22 PM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • Agreed. My son was almost 3 when my daughter was born. I let him help as much as I possibly could and he loved it. He put the dirty diapers in the garbage can, patted her back to burp her after she ate, brought me clean diapers, talked to her while her bum was being changed, held her(with my help of course), wash her in the bath, bring her toys etc...

    She is almost 8 months old now and she adores him. He loves her most of the time, lol.

    I also made sure that I would do special things with just him. We would go to dance class together once a week, read stories and have lots of cuddles while she naps, and praise the ever loving crap out of him whenever he helps or shares with her.

    Answer by Laila-May at 1:39 PM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • You've gotten good advice so far. When you're feeding baby, play with your preschooler. DS and I would play I Spy, "Hot-n-Cold" and Scavenger Hunt games that allowed me to sit with DD while he ran around looking for whatever it is I sent him to do. ;) He also helped take care of his sister. He'd burp her, get me diapers, sing her to sleep, etc. When the baby napped, that was "big kid time." I did not clean. I did not rest. I did nothing by play with my oldest. He loved it. (Of course, he also tried to get her to sleep as much as he could. LOL!) We moved his bed time back a little and spent a little extra time cuddling over story time. We made it a point to do something special with him and just him at last once a week - either DH or I would take him out to do something. It's an adjustment and he'll get there. My kids are now 7 and 5. There are days they want to strangle each other but usually they're the best of friends.

    Answer by ldmrmom at 2:07 PM on Apr. 8, 2010

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