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i need some help! i have a 9 yr old son who has a problem with anger and steal from myself and his siblings. i have tried grounding him and taking things away from him that he likes or likes to do and nothing is working. i am at my wits end. any suggestions on what i can do to get this to stop?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:34 AM on Apr. 8, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • Hmm, stealing, well I'd call the police and see if they will come out there and either talk to the child or take em down to the station
    GothicMama

    Answer by GothicMama at 8:38 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • You can treat the symptoms all you want but bad behavior wont stop until you find the root of the problem. Seek professional help.
    Christina2135

    Answer by Christina2135 at 8:42 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • Is there anything else going on with him? I went through a stealing thing when I was around that age - I was living with my mother who worked all the time, her husband who beat the hell out of her in front of me, my father never came for his weekend visits, and I just wanted some damn attention. Not saying you're not giving it to him, just saying that there could be something else going on.
    Wheepingchree

    Answer by Wheepingchree at 8:52 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • I would suspect that he feels that he isn't getting his fair share from you and this is his way of evening things up. You may not be actually making a difference in the way you treat your children, but if he perceives it that way, to him it is real. I think this would be particularly true if he happens to be the middle child. While any child can feel he is being squeezed out of the picture, it is probably more likely for a middle child to feel this way. You might try more positive reinforcement with him for a while. Look for and point out his good qualities and any accomplishments, and see if that makes any difference. If he is wanting more attention, and bad behavior is the only way he has of getting it, then he will behave badly just to get you to notice. There are other possibilites as to the why, but it is absolutely a sign that something is missing in his life and he is trying to fill that void.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:55 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • I had a son who acted like that you need to get help now before he is being led away in handcuffs we thought it was a phase but it was not he was locked up five times take care of it before he gets that record. IM me if you need to talk.

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:31 AM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • Instead of grounding and over the top discipline, perhaps you should try to develop your relationship with him. He sounds like he needs more parental attention or a different kind of attention. Check out the book "The incredible years" . I've used it and its made a huge difference in my relationship with both my kids. I feel more in control and not at my wits end with bad behavior. And, I rarely need to discipline. I spend more time having fun with and enjoying my kids and not stressing over their behavior! It's great!
    nwdeserangel

    Answer by nwdeserangel at 10:48 AM on Apr. 8, 2010


  • I have no idea how to help with that issue. My older brother was a theif from the get go. My parents didnt do anything, they said you cant prove he did it. He was in his late 20's before he stopped. And he only reason he stopped was because my younger brother caught him rifling through his car and wallet. He threatened to shoot him with his shotgun he was cleaning. They never really talked or got along after...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:12 PM on Apr. 8, 2010

  • Enforce your rules. Don't give him back anything until he can trust you. Be his PARENT not his friend.
    notjstanothrmom

    Answer by notjstanothrmom at 2:31 PM on Apr. 8, 2010

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