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How can you accurately......

Determine someone demeanor, motive or frame of mind through a simple question on any forum? Why is it that some ladies tend to twist what you say into something obviously not there? Do you think as I do that the question and answer section has gone to pot?


Asked by older at 10:29 AM on Apr. 9, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 69 (2,285,492 Credits)
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Answers (3)
  • People hear the words in their heads, in tones that are familiar to THEM. What someone else was thinking, or how they'd say it out loud themselves is not available to readers... so, many hear snippy, snotty, condescending tones when they're used to things being said that way.

    Familiar words lend themselves to familiar tones. Just like a mom saying 'are you going to wear that?' means nothing but 'are you dressed to go out now?' to some and 'omg, I can't believe how clueless you are about how you look in that hideous outfit' to others... people read what they think they're reading and respond accordingly.

    It's one of the reasons I don't mind the rare pieces of hate mail I receive on this site: I know how I meant it, if someone supplied something else I can't only not control it, I can't do anything about it after the fact, and it's easy to accept the fact that the insides of their heads are a vile place and not my problem.

    Answer by LindaClement at 3:16 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • No, it's not gone to pot. This is an ongoing problem with any sort of internet correspondence. You can only read into a question by using your own emotions. Same with emails. The way we are currently feeling plays a big role on how we view or read a question. It's human nature. When we are unable to determine emotions, we have to use our own. You can only take from a question what you need and discard the rest. No one tells you that you have to read each and every response. But, I do think you should own your own question and answer. That meaning, when you do answer a question, do not go back and read what others have answered in response. You do not have to defend your own answer, nor your question.

    Answer by m-avi at 10:35 AM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • m-avi, I have been here since the site started and back then this section was a breeze compared to now. You get insulted and attacked because a lot put their own spin to everything you say.

    Answer by older at 10:38 AM on Apr. 9, 2010