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How to discipline my toddler without spanking her? She's quite a handful!!!!

How do I discipline my 21 month old, who I have decided not to spank?

Today, she threw a phone and it hit me in the lip, making it bleed. Since she didn't do it on purpose, I let it go (the phone hitting me in the lip, that is). But I told her that throwing the phone was not ok.

Then later, she threw the phone again (on purpose), and I put her in the highchair for a minute. I then told her that she was put in the highchair because she threw the phone, and that was not ok. We had hugs and kisses and went on with our day.

Was that the right thing to do? She is starting to become a handful, and I want to get a handle on it before she thinks she has the run of our home (and her momma!!).

Thank you.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:54 PM on Apr. 9, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • "Was that the right thing to do? She is starting to become a handful, and I want to get a handle on it before she thinks she has the run of our home (and her momma!!)."

    Yay for you! I personally think you handled it perfectly.. And kudos to you for setting boundries and sticking to them.. It seems that every parenting question I read is about their children running all over them..
    This is just MY OPINION, I am guessing that you used the high chair to keep her in one spot.. But I would not use a high chair or her crib/bed for time outs.. She may get to where she associate their bed or chair with punishment and not want to go there when she should.. I would pick a "time out" spot and stick to it.. You may have to put her back several times but she will learn.. Just be consistent :)
    Mad_Hexer

    Answer by Mad_Hexer at 9:07 AM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Yeah, that's fine. Time outs can be very effective.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:57 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • That sounds good to me. Whatever you pick for discipline, being consistent is the key.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:57 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • I can see a third time coming.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:58 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • I'm glad you did that instead of striking her but she is still too young to understand what you are saying to her. Put the phone up. Put up all things you don't want her getting a hold of. Little kids play. They think life is a game. She thought throwing the phone was part of the game. Give her soft toys to play with and that way if she throws them no one gets hurt. I'm so proud of you for not spanking. It doesn't work anyway but I wanted you to know I'm glad you thought twice about doing it. It is not an effective teaching tool. It's just a means to bully a child when a parent can't think of anything else.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:01 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • i have started implementing time out more stringently as of late. my daughter is the same age and can have quite the attitude herself.

    her time out is in her crib. i leave her in it for 2 minutes and then take her out. everytime she hits me its time out. everytime she gets on a table its time out. she is getting better at not getting on tables or when i see her starting to get up on one and i say, do you want to go to time out she says no and puts her leg down. its funny.
    aly38914290

    Answer by aly38914290 at 11:33 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • time outs are a great way to discipline a toddler, but i would stop using the high chair...you don't want it to interfere with feeding time... same goes with using a crib. I've seen lots of moms on here say that they use the crib as a form of time out.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:37 PM on Apr. 9, 2010

  • Have someone else spank her if you can't.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:41 AM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • to anon37

    i use the crib because she can't get out of it. i put her in it and i leave the room. i make sure the light is on and i dont give her the elephant that she sleeps with. i make sure she understands its not bed time. and she has no trouble with either thus far and i have been doing it for a while now. obviously when i change her to a toddler bed, i will have to figure something else out. we haven't used a high chair in a LONG time now....so I never even thought of that. but yeah....she knows the difference between bedtime and in trouble time.
    aly38914290

    Answer by aly38914290 at 9:04 AM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • If throwing the phone is a no no, then you need to discipline every single time, whether she meant to hit you or not. You can't let it go, and intuit what her thought process was. You don't have to spank, contrary to a lot of parents beliefs, but you do need to be consistent, and recognize that at 21 months, yes, she can be disciplined.
    whiteroses82

    Answer by whiteroses82 at 11:54 AM on Apr. 10, 2010

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