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What would you do?

The situation is my boyfriend has 2 children from a previous marriage and I have 1 child and we recently just had a child together.

The problem is we hate, absolutely hate where we live (WA State). The weather is horrible and we do so much better in other areas where the weather is warmer and the city is more vibrant, etc...

The issue is we love my boyfriends 2 children from the previous marriage, love being close to them and we want to keep our new child and all the children close. Yet the depression of where we live the sadness of not being able to go outside that often do to weather is taking a toll and is not fair to kid

The 2 children are not able to re-locate cause the mother is not the nicest and does not want to move ever. The children however would love to, but it's just not happening from the mothers point of view.

Do we move and just make as many visits back as possible? This decision is so tough.

Please help

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:48 PM on Apr. 10, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • People always want to have what they can't. Is everyone in WA state depressed? if not, ask the happy ones how they do it. I live in south Texas and I am sick of the heat. Some days I wish I would live in Alaska.

    Answer by cristinaberger at 7:52 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Personally I wouldn't want to be away from my children, so I would probably just stay there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:54 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • I say just live with it. I live in CO and HATE snow these days. I would love to be in TX right now but I am also sure that the excitement would be fleeting. I think you should just take a small vacation to somewhere sunny. It is still not peak season so the rates should be lower than usual. I don't think you should move and distance yourselves from the children.

    Answer by Tf1990 at 7:56 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Why can't you go outside? I live in BC which is right above Washington state and we have the same weather.
    Just slap on a raincoat and some rubber boots and go jump in some puddles! :)

    It may not be the ideal place you want to live but you can always make the best of it while you're there.

    Answer by Laila-May at 8:01 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • i wouldnt move too far away from the kids, that could make your husband extremely unhappy. and warmer weather is on its way, winter is over. id just suck it up and dress warmer. my husbands family lives in spokane wa and they all love it there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:21 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Of course the other mom doesnt want to relocate, she has made roots there for her and her children. How did you end up there, if you hate it there? Those kids need their father, just like your little one needs its father...

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:27 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • I understand the weather thing. however whats more important. I'm sure these kids would love having their Dad around. can you scootch over to Idaho? Maybe a little more inland will give you more sunshine, but still be close enough for regular visits.

    Answer by tomib at 10:46 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Thank you everyone for your answer. I would like to answer a few things. First about going outside, I can't go outside because I absolutely hate it! It's like taking a tiger out of the jungle. I don't belong! My boyfriend hate's it too! I ended up here when my parents moved me here when i was 17 and had no choice, i am from LA and my boyfriend was raised here and had escaped but moved back when he got a divorce. I understand that they need their father and they need there siblings too but I feel that my kids need a mother too and I am not as good as I could be when I hate my life! It is not fair that everyone has to suffer because their mother wants to live in the most depressing state. Why is it up to her? Why can't there be a compromise? Anyone understand? =[

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:48 PM on Apr. 11, 2010

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