Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Confused what should i/we whatever do?

My mother comes over today and hands me her computer and tell me i need to look at some pictures she found on their (long story she has been moving around and just got it from my aunts where she just moved out of a months or so ago) The pictures are of my 8 year old brother will be 9 in a month. They are all naked there was more than 5 of them of them some he was holding his penis one he was like on his knees standing on like a kitchen chair towards the back up against it, one was of him bent over it was a pic of his but. I got sick looking at them but thinking about figured he is at that age where he is curios about himself and his body thought maybe he did it him self. She had already talked to him before she came and got on his case (for lack of better terms) about it askin who did what happened tell me who so they don't hurt you or anyone else again. After a while he told her my 11 year old cousin did it and she hurt him.

Answer Question

Asked by mrsbean08 at 9:31 PM on Apr. 10, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 17 (3,629 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • i am not sure if he said because of what she said and felt the need to some how so when my husband got home he brought him to the other room and talked to him thinking the same thing i was that maybe he took them his self. He told him my cousin made threatend him to take them allow her to take them idk. He says she didn't touch him or anything but still. I know im am all over the place and probally rambling a little but i dont know what to do i need some advice what do we do, what do we say i am very confused, sickened and scared

    Answer by mrsbean08 at 9:31 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • call the police. and have an investigation done. they will find out what really happened.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:35 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Okay, break it down. Since you don't know, keep him away from this cousin. end of story there. Now, tell him he's safe to talk to you or your husband and if he's curious about his body, that's okay. Tell him the picture taking can be bad because the pics can end up going on the interenet by other people and no one wants that (pedophiles buy them). It's okay to explore his body, no issue there but if someone is making him take photos, that's different. Don't scare the heck out of him or make him feel ashamed. Keep that cousin away at all costs in case he's telling the truth. Watch him, prod him for more info and if you can or if he exhibits any strange (out of the ordinary) behavior, call the pediatrician for a therapist consult. You caring is most important. Tell him he's loved and you don't freak out. It'll be okay.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 9:36 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • If they are on an adult's computer that's child porn and if she's showing those pix that's distribution of child porn.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:36 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • I want to start by saying that I was molested by my cousin who is 1.5 years older than me once when i was about 4 so he was about 6. my family kept us a part for a while, but at some point we were around one another at family holidays/birthdays. at some point before the age of 12 (i dont remember when it started, i just remember 12 because if was the first time i VERBALIZED no) he started molesting me at almost every family get together. The last time he touched me I was 16. I never told my mom that it happened after the time i was 4 until I was 17. There are times I wish that I had pressed charges, but I have yet to ever do that.

    my history of molestation has effected me in countless ways, but the biggest guilt for me was when i found out way later that he had touched my little sister! I was so mad and sad. It still makes me cry to think about it. and every time I do it makes me want to press charges now. cont.

    Answer by aly38914290 at 9:37 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • I am now 26.

    First and foremost, KEEP THEM APART! Second get your brother into counseling. Third inform your cousin's parents of what has been discovered. I would file a formal report with the police. Turn the pictures into authorities. Do all the procedures you would if it wasn't your little cousin who did it.

    Now, that being said, it is VERY probable that the 11 year old was molested/abused as well if the 11 yr old cousin is doing this. I would try be forgiving, but at the same time, you need to protect your brother. had my cousin and i been kept apart from the get go our we gone to authorities its possible that he would have never touched my sister. and i would give anything for that. its much easier to live with your own pain than someone elses. i am me. i have dealt with my crap - or rather i deal with it daily, i can't stand that my sister has to live with it too.

    Answer by aly38914290 at 9:41 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • first she only showed them to me his sister becuase she is scared and wants to know what to do and wants to keep them in case she presses charges. she hasn't had the computer since jan. she brought it there and left it alone (she doesn't really know how to use a comp. she got it to learn how and go to school on it) I very seriously doubt that she would go to jail for this,

    Answer by mrsbean08 at 9:52 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • also we told her mother and asked her to come over and talk to us about it all she said was how long will it take im taking the kids out tonight.. REALLY? i understand the importance of spending time with your children and all but i think this is more important right now. I was just informed that they asked her about and she said no.. So that is it ask her about and whatever she says is ok?

    Answer by mrsbean08 at 9:55 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • please, i know that it may all be some mix up, but at least getting the authorities involved will help to protect your brother if not and also will help get to the bottom of what is really going on.

    obviously your aunt and uncle aren't taking this as seriously as they not let this go.

    Answer by aly38914290 at 9:59 PM on Apr. 10, 2010

  • Someone had to load the pics onto the computer. Does the 11 year old know how to download pics ( I know kids know how to use computers) Is there a possibility that the 11 year old has been molested? I ask because another child might have taken the pics but then go as far as loading them on a computer seems odd.
    My first question is the possibility of both children having been molested. From what I understand and adult that does this threatens the children. Maybe your brother is frightened of an adult?

    Answer by PrttyMstng at 7:46 AM on Apr. 11, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.