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How do you know whether insecurities is a bad thing?

I was in a relationship from Dec.04-Apr.09 (17-22) My ex was verbally and physically abusive and we now share a 3 1/2 y/o son together. As a child he (my ex) was very overweight he lost a tremendous amount at 16 and is now considered husky but no where near what he use to be (280lbs). But the fat man that lived inside him never left and he was extremely insecure and jealous, his feelings abou being self-conscious came out in anger and rage. So, now that I've been single for a year and I'm slowly but surely gaining confidence, I started taking numbers when I'm being pursued, I met this guy who as of now I'm just talking on the phone with but he's cute, talks sense, has 2jobs, a car, an apt, and a son (which is a plus) who he raises full time (even greater plus) I went to his myspace and saw his pics after I got his number and didnt realize how handsome he was until I saw his pics, & I complemented him and he (cont)

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:38 PM on Apr. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • seemd so surprised, He also told me that he wasn't photogenic, which is so not true. I thought he must really have it going on but he don't seem to think so, I'm thinking he's one of a kind a keeper, which he is. So today I let him stop by and we stood outside and talked for about an hour or so and I noticed why he was so self-conscious. He has bad teeth. IDK how bad b/c I didn't see him with his whole mout open but its bad, But its not steering me away. But I did start to think how is this going to affect his treatment towards me towards me once he realizes that I do like him. i'm just afraid that he might be one of those people that takes his problems out on the one who's totally there for him and shows him nothing but love and appreciation. Its unfair to leave a person b/c of a flaw but how do you know that the flaw is one tht you and he both can live with, b/c some people never get over whats wrong with them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:38 PM on Apr. 11, 2010

  • Its just teeth, he can get them fixed if he wanted to. Are they bad like crack head bad, or just not straight? Most people that have not so perfect teeth don't usually have trust problems...but if it's like crack head bad...I would rethink the whole wanting him thing. The only way you will know if it's going to work, is to go for it.

    Answer by GotToHaveFaith at 9:46 PM on Apr. 11, 2010

  • I mean they look bad but then again I wasn't all up in his mouth. I wouldn't say crackhead bad maybe neglect at some point but he has alot of responsiblities that he's keeping up so i doubt that he's on drugs(single parenting,car/car insur,cellphone,apt lease). i'm thinking more technical like maybe some type of difieciency vitamin c or something or something that affects bones b/c after all teeth are bones.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:51 PM on Apr. 11, 2010

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