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For moms who spank

If you read that the American Psychological Association does not support spanking and has a highly supported study out that shows the negative impact a child who is even spanked TWICE can experience, would you stop?

Notice that they define spanking as something that doesn't physically harm the child, so we're not talking about beatings, we're talking about what spankers label as spanking.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Apr. 12, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (19)
  • I've spanked my kids when they'd done something flat-out dangerous, like running from me in a parking lot, so, no, I wouldn't stop.

    Answer by Amy0481 at 8:17 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I agree with the above poster. I NEVER spank out of frustration, only when their or a sibling's SAFETY is in jeopardy. I was spanked PLENTY as a child...and I grew up to RESPECT my parents and grandparents (who also spanked me when I deserved it), and I am highly educated, and had a fast-track, 6-figure salary career, before i slowed down to have a family. No negative impact here! I learned to respect authority, became focused and disciplined BECAUSE I knew the repercussions if I got out of line.

    Conversely, I've met a few "anti-spanking" parents in my travels, most of whom have very bratty, entitled and undisciplined "young adults" in their children (most of whom are under 8 years of age), and I can see now, that the teen years are NOT going to be fun for those parents.

    Answer by LoriKeet at 8:27 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • Nope, i wouldn't stop. I do believe spanking in anger harms kids, but it's not possible to study the difference between children spanked in anger versus those spanked by a parent who is thoughtful, loving, intentional, but not spanking in anger. I know too many un-spanked kids who do not have healthy boundaries and drive everyone around them nuts. (not to say that is the case with every kid who's not spanked). I read an article today that very few parents prefer spanking as a regular means of discipline. I wonder if that's why kids in general seem to be more out of control?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:30 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • My children are 40, 37, and 33. They were spanked when they were little, and they are all very well-adjusted stable adults. Not one of them has ever been in the least violent. Most of the children who grew up with mine were also spanked. Again, very well adjusted law-abiding citizens. So, I think this study is pretty much bunk and most likely is designed to keep parents from using the one form of discipline that actually teaches children to be obedient and respectful.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:33 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • i do my best to limit the number of spankings they get. it's not our main form of discipline.
    if their life is in danger. yes. they will get spanking for that.
    when i've tried everything else (from rewards system to, loss of all privileges) then yes, i will spank then too.

    i was spanked. i do not feel as if i'm all effed up because of it either.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 8:34 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I've read it, and I'll still spank. I'll take the advice of parents who have raised children into healthy happy adults over the adivice of a study anyday.

    Answer by daughteroftruth at 8:35 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I would have to agree with the other posters.. Spanking is not my or my husbands main and only form of discipline but you can bet if everything else fails or they are doing something dangerous I will spank.


    Answer by midnightmoma at 8:47 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • Yes, all 3 of my children are horrible people. My daughter the teacher, my son the EMT and my son fighting for your country. I see how spanking has ruined my kids. BTW how do you put a 2 yr old in time out when a 2 yr old can't reason?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:53 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • A two year old can't reason? Than he or she does not know why your spanking them.

    Answer by ArkTech at 8:57 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I spank and I will continue to spank. I have a toddler of 21 mos and sometimes spanking when she has done something wrong is the only thing that works. We timeout for tantrums and spanking for something that could potentially harm her like standing up in the tub when she has been told repeatedly to sit down. I was spanked and I must be a horrible person--being the first in my family to graduate high school, go to college and acceptance into nursing school. Boy my mom did a terrible job with me. She will spank my LO when she needs it while she is under her supervision. That study is crap in my opinion.

    Answer by coala at 9:11 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

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