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What do you think of the adoptive mom who returned the child back to Russia, alone?

I think she should have stuck it out for the child's sake and give it her all. If it were her own child would she have put him up for adoption? She needed to try harder.

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Asked by GinNTonic at 9:57 PM on Apr. 12, 2010 in Politics & Current Events

Level 18 (6,147 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • I think that children are not shoes that can be returned just because they don't "fit". I find it ridiculous and sickening that she did this. Not only did she "return" this child, like he was a pair of shoes, but she put him on a plan BY HIMSELF. What if he had gotten kidnapped, killed, etc..................she didn't think it thru!

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 10:01 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • She should have taken him back herself or with an adult not sent him alone with a note. That's just bad. I bet her own kids are scared now that she'll do the same to them if she gets angry with them. What a poor excuse for a mom.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:03 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I was adopted and i I think this women is pathetic. I'm sure she knew that issues might arise, and as a parent she should have jumped through hoops to get help for her adopted child. I feel so bad for the responsible people who might not get a child from Russia because of this loser.


    Answer by Mom2princessq at 10:09 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • Woman****

    Answer by Mom2princessq at 10:09 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • IDK. Apparently she was lied to about his mental condition. Or she felt she was. She most definatly should not have sent him back alone. But I do not think her own kids would be afraid that she would send them away if she got angry with them. I think that is a bit far fetched.

    Answer by Raine2001 at 10:09 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I agree. When you make a committment to raise a child, whether its your own or an adopted one, you can't just hit undo when the going gets tough. All children have their challenges and I think its horrible that she just said I quit and shipped the child away. While I do understand that some children that have been through the foster care system have ALOT of issues by the time they actually get to an adoptive family, this child is even going to be more traumatized from this now. I'm sure whatever problems she was encountering weren't anything some family counseling or therapy couldn't at least help.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:12 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • If that was her own BIO child, she would be finding a way to HELP HIM, not send him with a ONE WAY ticket to anywhere else..

    Its disgusting and I feel bad for the boy


    Answer by sweet-a-kins at 10:24 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • Lied to or not, do you really think that adopting an older child would be easier then an infant? Seriously? And the fact that this child has grown up in RUSSIA! Culture shock, possible abuse in foster care, being bounced around, orphanage. She didn't do her homework. I was adopted at 5 years old and before that I was in 3 different foster homes. I had issues..........but my parents didn't "return" me. People fail to realize that these children are PEOPLE too. They are not objects that you just toss to the side if it gets too hard. If you can't handle that then don't adopt and don't have children. For crying out loud, if she had given birth to a mentally disabled child, would she just toss that one to the curb too???

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 10:24 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I think this woman should be banned from adopting children. She could have handled it better. I understand stand her not being able to handle the child and wanting to back out of the adoption. I don't understand why she just shipped him back 'return to sender'. She should have taken him back herself or if she couldn't afford to do that at the very least gone to some place here in the U.S. and said I can't handle this child. I think she was expecting a perfect child and when adopting an older child you don't usually get that. They tend to come with problems and it takes a special kind of person to be able to handle those kinds of problems and help the child realize that they are loved.


    Answer by JAIRATRACI at 10:25 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

  • I think she should have tried harder. As for the mental state of the child, RAD, doesn't rear its ugly head until up to a year after placement. So, they may not have known. Children in Russia are typically in orphanages and don't get the attention they need so, they are bound to have attachment problems. She should have been educated on that. She was expecting a perfect child and that RARELY happens with older child adoptions, international or domestic. I feel horrible for this child and in no way excuse the mother but, before passing judgment some of you should read up on Reactive Attachment Disorder. I have had my 6 y/o for 3 years and he is just now coming around. I have went through the threats, the tantrums, the manic mood swings and the acting like a psycho. Its rough. Again, I think she gave up too easy and she could have gotten him the help he deserved.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:06 PM on Apr. 12, 2010

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