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I think my husband is jealous of our children's time they get with me :(

So I just had our second child 2 weeks ago and I take care of my step son, my husband just went back to work a couple of days ago to a very stressful job that he hates in the oilfield. Well he came home last night and started rubbing on me and I thought hey am I really about to get a nice massage (he absolutly hates doing that) but when I told him good night and gave him a kiss he blew up talking about guys had needs and that didn't make him any different! I dont know what to do anymore, then he started telling me that all his friends cheat on their wives and he said being good never pays. What do I do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:49 AM on Apr. 13, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Give him a blow job. That's all he wants. Men have 3 basic needs. Food, sleep, and sex. They eat, have sex and go to bed. That's about it. Blow him one good time and he will leave you alone.

    sunshine06

    Answer by sunshine06 at 9:10 AM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • You just had a baby two weeks ago and he expects you to have sex with him... Does he not understand what your body just went through and that it is not advised to have sex right now.. I say let him take care of himself, if that's not good enough for him until you are allowed to return to your sexual activity, then you really don't want or need someone like that.. He really should be more understanding..
    midnightmoma

    Answer by midnightmoma at 9:10 AM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • Well my man does the same thing every once in a while & I have to remember the only reason I have those kids is because of him & the "time" we got together. You just had a baby so the sex is a no no right now, but ( I know I hate doing it) but there are ways to please him too & you have too. You don't have too but I'm sure you wanna make him happy too. He does deserve a little slow touch every once in a while. A nice blow job or a good hand job will please him. Or heck let him "titty" screw you. I find it quite pleasing actually! My man works a hard job too, power plant 12hrs a day 6 days a week. All the guys he works with are scum & he's good to me. but he shouldn't have said what he did. Being nice never pays I"d woop his ass for that one! Good Luck with him hun!
    rebel07

    Answer by rebel07 at 9:11 AM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • We call the blow job a "blue moon" because thats how often it happens. I don't understand him right now. With our first child he didn't do this but we did end up hating each other by the time he was 1. I was afraid it was going to happen again. I think he's also jealous because I'm not going back to work, but he can't put that on me because we both decided on that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:21 AM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • For some reason men don't mentally prepare for the '6 week waiting period'. Honestly they probably don't have the ability. For some people sex is a big part of the relationship so if they don't get it things go down hill. Give him a blow job more often, or find some other way to please him. At least he wants you to do it and not himself (or another woman). That says something.  Maybe trade a massage for you, a BJ for him.  As for everything else, it sounds like you two need to sit down and have a good, civil, talk. No yelling or screaming. Just two adults working out their issues. If you can't do that or it doesn't work, try counseling.

    sunshine06

    Answer by sunshine06 at 9:30 AM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • I gave bj's when I was not able to do anything with twins birth 9 months ago. Your hubby is just sexually frustrated. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. But I do think when you keep your hubby happy, he will work to keep you happy too. Men are simple! Food, sex, sleep! Besides sex will releive some tension for him since he hates his job. Sex is a stress reducer as I am sure a back rub would do wonders for you. My theory is always love your man and meet his needs as someday kids will be gone and all you will have is what you put into the relationship.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 9:41 AM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • lol i dont think your DH is jealous of the time the kids get with you. he wants sex. you cannot give it to him just yet, so compromise-- go to a sex store and get him a pocket pussy. they are like what, $15? he can "cheat" on you with his pocket pussy. you could even get one so its YOUR sex area- like a mold of your private. not sure how much that costs tho.

    oh- and i'd probably tell him that if he threatened to cheat on me one more time, he mine as well do it cuz i wont be staying with him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:12 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • He just wants some attention, whats wrong with that. Give him a BJ and he'll be happy.
    gulfcoastmom4

    Answer by gulfcoastmom4 at 1:47 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

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