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Does you husband favor one of the kids....

I have a 3 year old daugter and a 1 year old son.... my husband is a good dad to boht but he clearly favors our daugter over our son. I know it is mainly because she is older and able to do more things but it is ticking me off and now we are arguing about ( well me yelling at him for it) ....

He will constantly want to take our daughter places and even just play outside with her, and not take our son...and he is old enough to know, because he watched out the window and gets upset ( I make him come back in to get him) ...but he knows, like when my husband asks her if she wants to go outside my son will say ME! and get his shoes and everything ( obviouse he knows ) .... sometimes he has even bought our daughter things and not our son, his excuse being, they didnt have anything for babies. It makes me so mad, I dont know what to say to get it through his thick head that he is being unfair. * continued*

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glamomomo

Asked by glamomomo at 3:10 PM on Apr. 13, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 11 (568 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Now wehn he starts to talk about going somewhere or asks our daughter if she wants to go somewhere I tell him he cannot take her unless he takes him too...and he tries to say he cant hold onto to both of them while he is doing such & such..... so I say, well just take him.....he ends up going without either of them.......

    I know when he gets older it will probably change but I am not going to let it keep happening, becasue like I said, our son knows what he is doing and I also think it is showing our daughter that she is more special or something.....
    glamomomo

    Answer by glamomomo at 3:12 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • He is much easier on the girls than the boys.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 3:12 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • Men and their daughters! LOL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:19 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • my dh loves his first born...they have similar traits and dh thinks that is the greatest. he doesn't believe me that he plays favorites, but he does.
    happy2bmom25

    Answer by happy2bmom25 at 3:30 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • happy2bmom25 -- I think that is why he is that way too -- him and my daugter are like twins lol... not only in their looks but the way they act too....my son is more like me
    glamomomo

    Answer by glamomomo at 3:34 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • Mine is really protective of our daughter. She is younger than our son but she is his princess. He was not at all like this with our son. He told me once it's because he didn't spend much time with our son when he was a baby so he doesn't want to make that mistake again. He doesn't spend more time with her per se, but he is very careful and easy with her. With our son he is the rough and tumble dad.
    wildflowers25

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 3:36 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • she is older and a lot easier to handle or she is just daddy's little girl. it's a phase. don' t take it too hard ur son's turn will come too. Aleast hubby wants to take a child with him some men just want to leave alone so don't make too much of a big deal. GL
    Butterfly1108

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 3:38 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • I think you should really ask him think about how your son must feel when his Dad and sister are outside playing and he is watching from the window. It is one thing to have special Daddy/Daughter time and I don't think everything has to be done with both kids but once in a while he could take your daughter on an errand and then the next time take your son. It might not be as easy to take a one year old but that doesn't mean your son should never get to go. I have heard it said that the most influential person in a child's life is their same sex parent so for your son, his Daddy is the coolest man in the world and your son will want to be just like him, please remind your husband of what an awesome responsibility this is. How would your DH feel if your son wanted to play with Mommy and not include Daddy? He would probably feel just as bad as your son does when he is left out now. Good luck getting thru to him.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 4:00 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • He might not be comfortable with the baby. My DH wasn't like that, but my dad is with my kids. Once they get a certian age he will pay attention to them. He just is not comfortable around babies or toddlers. Plus he doesn't like all the noise. lol He also favors my daughters over my son, but it's because the girls are way calmer and will sit and listen to him tell his crazy stories. My son will not shut up long enough for my dad to say a word. But as my son gets older dad spends more time with him and includes him more. DH doesn't like to take the babies out though. He will take the older ones OR the youngest, but not both and definetly not all 5. It just makes him nervous. Men don't have that mommy instinct. Some just can't handle more than one kid at a time. Stop yelling at him and ask him what is going on. If he is uncomfortable then help him, not force him. Force can make him resent you and the baby.
    sunshine06

    Answer by sunshine06 at 6:01 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

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