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Sacrafice or happiness?

For years I have been the one to sacrafice my own happiness, let things go even though I was miserable, in the interest of keeping the peace, keeping everyone happy, and being helpful. At this point in my life I feel like I am tired of sacraficing myself and I want to find my own happiness. The problem with doing this is that it will involve big changes and others will be hurt in the process. I am torn between what I have always done and what I really want to do! How do you decide to do what makes you happy, knowing full well others will be unhappy in the process?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:34 PM on Apr. 13, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Well, I don't know the full situtaion here but my opinion is to go with your own happiness. Having to ask myself that question before, I thought it all out carefully before I opened up about it. I went with my own happiness which also brought more tough situations but overall I don't regret it and I know that had I gone down the other path and sacrificed my feelings, I'd be completely miserable and really annoyed all the time. So, go with your gut!
    MommaCassE

    Answer by MommaCassE at 4:40 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • It depends, you need to be more specific. Who will get hurt for your happiness? A husband you don't love? Children? What is it that will make you happy? What do you want to do?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:39 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • I agree with the post above. I don't think you should ever have to be miserable in order to please others. If you are then it sounds like something is deeply wrong with the relationship to begin with. Talk to whoever you are having the issues with...maybe it's something that could be worked out together. If not, then try to do some soul searching and figure out what WILL make you happy in your life and go from there...good luck!
    rlhall1980

    Answer by rlhall1980 at 4:42 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • you can always compromise... and for everything that you have given up/sacraficed in the past, the other person should be grateful and now give something up in order for you to achieve your dreams. example: my BF's dad quit HS so my BF's mom and finish and go to college. he worked a job he HATED for 20 years, to support her and her dreams.. now, its time for him to get his GED (he's 40 years old) and he's cutting his job down to part time and its her turn to help support their family, in order for him to achieve his dream (the GED).
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:56 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • Ummm It really depends on what you want. You should not have gotten married and had kids if you really wanted something that would hurt them when youjust decided to do it.
    It's not right for yo uto be miserable but if a compromise can't be reached it reall depends on what it is you think you need to do to be happy.
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 5:07 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

  • It is your perception that others will be hurt. You'd feel foolish to find out others would adjust easily to your choices for happiness. That would mean your self imposed sacrifice was in vain. Life is too short to sacrifice. The last sacrifice that meant anything was when Jesus hung on the cross. Quit being a martyr, find your happiness. If you don't then you will just blame others bc you never found it. You are not getting younger. Go get it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:12 PM on Apr. 13, 2010

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