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How long is long enought for a 15 year old girl to be at the mall with 7 friends?

It's vacation week and my daughter would like to meet 7 of her friends at the mall today. One is a boy who recently "asked her out" and she's known for 2 years. I know of him and saw him at a track meet...he seems very nice and is nice to her. Most of the others I know from band and other school events. This group is not my daughter's usual group of friends which actually consist of 3 other girls who are not quite as social as my daughter...or at least my daughter wants to be more social and hang with some others. She tried including her friends, but they don't want to go along. She's a bit hurt by that, but wants to go anyway. She's very trustworthy and an honors student. I'm fine with it, but isn't about 2 to 2 1/2 hours plenty to start?? Any thoughts?

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Asked by dflygirl7 at 7:35 AM on Apr. 14, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 12 (751 Credits)
Answers (21)
  • 2 to 2 1/2 hours would be my first instinct, too. It depends on what they are going to do, if they are going to have lunch- that's about an hour, then shopping for an hour and a half sounds good. Trust your instincts.

    Answer by Bmat at 7:40 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • I personally don't think 2 and 1/2 hours at the mall with 7 friends will be enough time.. Figure the drive there and back plus the waiting for everyone to get there, they may only have about an hour together.. If you trust your DD and this is during the day with alot of friends I would say give her more time.. As soon as she gets there, it will be time to go.. I have a 17 year old and she can spend about 4 hours in our mall with eating. By then she is ready to go not unless they are watching a movie.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 8:12 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • when i was 15 my grandma would drop us off and we would spend almost the entire afternoon. Our mall had an arcade, then we would eat at ruby tuesdays, we would just fart around some, then most the time we would go behind the mall and watch our boyfriends skateboard.

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:24 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • I wouldn't drop her off and leave her there at all for any length of time. I know that I'm older and quite out-dated, but I also am at the mall quite often and observe these groups of teens and what they do while they are hanging out with no supervision. To begin with, I would be a little suspicious as to why your daughter has been included and her other closer friends are refusing to go. To me, that's a huge red flag. If you want to offer a compromise, tell your daughter she can invite her new friends to come to your house and visit today. While your daughter may be quite trust-worthy, never underestimate the power of peer influence, especially when a child knows she has several hours before anyone will be checking up on her. I refused to put my children into situations for which they were not yet prepared to resist powerful temptations. I hope you choose to do the same.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:41 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • I say no more than 3 hours. I mean we have decent size mall here, but ti's not huge. However DH and I can spend 2 hours there, easily. After 2 have her call and say if she wants to stay one more hour, I think that's totally fair.

    Answer by katzmeow726 at 9:14 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • With that many friends that she doesnt know well, it would be very easy for her to get into some trouble, all it takes is 1 person to 'come up with an idea' and the rest will follow! I would say dont leave her alone, stay in the mall while shes there for a bit, tell her she has 2 hours.. then in 2 hours go find her and tell her you are leaving and give her another 2 hours with her friends, that will be plenty enough time for you to see how she can cope with that many 'friends' and stay out of trouble!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:15 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • That said...when I was a teen I could spend hours with my friends...arcade, food court, clothes. Those were the days! Oh and NannyB, you are being overly suspicious. I had different groups of friends, once of which never wanted to go to the mall. Going to the mall with friends is an exciting and fun thing to do as a teenager. And with a group of 7? I doubt that they are going to be doing THAT much in a mall. I think it is horrible that you would insinuate that the OP allows her child to get into "compromising" situations just by letting her go to the mall.


    Answer by katzmeow726 at 9:18 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • ITS not enough time LOL..I once spent 7 hours at the mall and didnt even realize it lol..Thats a total of maybe 16 stores and 300 bucks of cloths :/ (Thanks mom lol) also included lunch a movie and then dinner.My mom called me every hour...She even came to the mall with my little sister to join us for the dinner part..Time really just flies lol

    Answer by ryanlynn at 9:24 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • I think your 2 or 3 hours limit is fine,, I think it is good to hang out with all groups, and I assume you know your daughter well enought that she would do anything silly to fit in with the new group, the only way I would let it go on longer is if they are going to a movie or something! EEK--I don't know what I will do when DS becomes a teen, lol! They grow up so fast!

    Answer by kimigogo at 9:24 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • Sounds fair to me, you could check in around 2 hours and see what they are up to. If they just finished shopping and are going to eat you may consider some extra time for that.

    Answer by soyousay at 9:24 AM on Apr. 14, 2010

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