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how to prepare an 18month old for a newborn sibbling?

my son is going to be 19months old and i'm due in 2 weeks with our little girl. i'm really nervous about how he's going to treat her bc he's going throu the tantrum stage where he like to throw his cups when he doesnt get his way and i dont want him throwing them at her. he knows that there's a baby in my stomach and he rubs my belly all the time and i keep telling him that his little sister is going to be here soon but how can i better prepare him for what's to come?

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katitim

Asked by katitim at 12:24 PM on Apr. 14, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (6)
  • No need to prepare him he's too young to understand anyway. He'll adjust. Just make sure you don't push him away or make him feel the baby is getting all the attention and he's not. He'll be fine. He just wants to be included.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:26 PM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • I agree, just let him help mommy with the baby like get you a diaper or a special blanket and he will adjust just fine..just keep him involved.
    geminisummerz

    Answer by geminisummerz at 12:31 PM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • My 5th is due when my 4th will be 20 months. I have been collecting small toys (Dollar Store, craigslist, yard sales) for a couple of months now that I can pull out for him one at a time during the first couple of weeks to occupy him when I need to spend some extra time with the newborn. My 2nd and 3rd were 18 months apart and my 2nd basically ignored his baby sister until she was old enough for him to play with - no jealousy, no tantrums. I'm hoping for the same experience!
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 12:38 PM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • you sound like you're doing all the preparing you can do before she gets here. Once here is when it's really going to count. INCLUDE INCLUDE INCLUDE him in everything! my son will be 18 months when his brother gets here in a few weeks and we are going to involve him in everything. changing, feeding, holding, rocking, reading....and I will also make sure to set time for my first son aside so it can just be special him and me time. I understand the tantrum phases, right now your son is VERY frustrated that he can't tell you exactly what's going on. He just doesn't have the vocab, be sure and talk full sentences to him about everything. He's going to be just fine. I think once he sees baby and realizes you guys get to take her home it will be a whole new story. good luck!
    Adeline1210

    Answer by Adeline1210 at 12:39 PM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • thank you everyone for all of your input!! i cant wait! everyone has really put my nerves to ease!!!!
    katitim

    Answer by katitim at 1:03 PM on Apr. 14, 2010

  • I would focus on encouraging behaviors that are safe or nice around a little one more than prepping him per se. He isn't going to get it and what little he does understand does not translate into having an infant in your arms in a few weeks. Sometimes they do well with a "baby" of their own where you can enourage positive play, but I wouldn't worry too much. It will be easier to teach him in the moment rather than prep him for something very abstract. I would ride him for throwing things, though. I run a playgroup and have seen one to many new ones get nailed hard by an older sibling. being nice doesn't work for those moments. that's something you can start on now and you don't have to make it about babies since its not safe in general.
    mrs_pulley

    Answer by mrs_pulley at 2:09 PM on Apr. 14, 2010

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