Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Should I stay with him or should I ask him to leave?

I have been married for 8 years everything seemed fine at first but lately not so good. We both work full time.we have two children ages 3 (currently in childcare) and 8 (currently in Day camp) I am paying for both tuitions...rent...and all the bills...yet he has no money. I found out his checking account is $500 in the negative and he is behind on all his bills ...which is killing my credit because they are in my name. What should I do? I do not have feelings for him cuz I feel he is just bringing me down!!! We fight constantly andd he never helps out with anything..except the dishes.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:21 PM on Jun. 18, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • Well, I think you already know what you need to do. You said it yourself, You don't have feelings for him. Why be with someone who brings you down? Good luck mama!
    AriezGoddess

    Answer by AriezGoddess at 7:23 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • If you are married what bills does he have that are not shared? Make sure you call all of these bills that are in your name and put his name and social security number on them too so you aren't the only one responsible. If you are going to divorce get a good lawyer, it really is important.

    But mostly...I think you answered your own question.
    templeghost

    Answer by templeghost at 7:42 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • sorry to say, but i think you already know you're stuck with atleast half the debt regardless...well, depending on what state you are in...i say get out ASAP....if he really cared for your family he wouldnt be ruining your financial future...you could lose your home, have difficulty getting college loans for the kids...tons of things...if you get out now, you should be able to salvage you and your kids financial future...oh, and make sure your child support gets deducted directly from his paycheck, cite the history of nonpayment of other bills in court
    LoriaAnn

    Answer by LoriaAnn at 7:48 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • Go counseling !
    roseisme

    Answer by roseisme at 8:28 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • pray for your answer if you believe in a higher power,or listen to the advise given from all the other mom's which is all good...good luck!
    kimsboys

    Answer by kimsboys at 8:59 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • You answered your own question, if you feel theres no working it out leave but if you want to stay go to cousling. Maybe try getting some budgetting help.
    jlbtnc

    Answer by jlbtnc at 9:09 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • counseling! Always do counseling first.. then you can at lest say that you tried your best when your children grow up and ask.
    pipandmijosmom

    Answer by pipandmijosmom at 10:28 PM on Jun. 18, 2008

  • Have you actually given your 100% in this marriage? Does not make enough money? Is it really all about money? SOrry that this is happening, sounds very sad. I would talk to him first.
    Ifiwereabook

    Answer by Ifiwereabook at 1:00 PM on Jun. 19, 2008

  • get him OUT ASAP. Not only he's is drowning you and your credit, but he IS a bad daddy figure, he's not capable to teach the kids how to be responsible and independent because he hasnt figure it out for him self yet.
    ali98

    Answer by ali98 at 3:01 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

  • When I first got pregnant my mom said something I didn't listen to until recently. "the choices you make now are going to decide how not only your life goes but your childrens as well". Now I interpret that as, my life, my general happiness, all of these things affect what kid of parent I am. My life is only as good as I make it. So it's your decision, but remember that if he brings you down, he's bringing your kids down too.
    Hannah-Belle

    Answer by Hannah-Belle at 5:38 PM on Jul. 17, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN